


Rent-A-Girlfriend

by Handoverthebooty



Category: Life Is Strange (Video Game)
Genre: A lot of almost-kissing, Anime Tropes Abound, Awkwardness, F/F, Fluff, Kinda, Mutual Pining, Role Reversal, this is like a twenty-five chaptered oneshot i have made several mistakes here
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-11-13
Updated: 2016-07-18
Packaged: 2018-05-01 10:48:53
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 24
Words: 25,846
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5203019
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Handoverthebooty/pseuds/Handoverthebooty
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>"How much?"</p><p>"Huh?" Max replied, confusion leaking into her tone. "How much for what?"</p><p>"You."</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. In Which Max isn't For Sale

**Author's Note:**

> This is kind of a role-reversal au! Max is the popular one while Vic is the angry loner :D. They'll still have their personalities, except Max'll be a lil more confident, as i'd imagine popularity and a lot of friends would liven up her self-esteem a bit.
> 
> (I got the idea from my amazing friend Flower_Fawn! She's a goddamn idea machine, i swear. Her stories are amazing tho, def recommend em)

"How much?"

Those were the first words that Victoria Chase said to Max Caulfield. Max was minding her own beeswax, as usual, when the wannabe-queen-bee just waltzed over to her desk and spoke to her like _Max_ was the scum of the earth. It was the other way around, if you asked most people. 

"Huh?" Max replied, confusion leaking into her tone. Victoria glared down at her. 

"I said, _how much?_ " She dragged the words out way too slowly, like Max was stupid or something. Jesus, she'd heard stories of how annoying Victoria was, but assumed they were just exaggerated. All she'd gotten so far from the stuck-up loner was a glare or two. 

"How much for what?"

"You." Victoria answered immediately with no shame whatsoever.

What did she just say...?

"WHAT." Max blurted out loudly, alerting several of their classmates, who were now staring. Fantastic. 

"I'm not going to repeat myself, Caulfield." The vicious way Victoria uttered her name would be more effective if there wasn't a slight tinge of red to her cheeks now. Max was honestly confused as all fuck. Was....Did.....

"Are you trying to pay me to have sex with you?" Victoria's already flushed face reddened further. "Oh my god, you totally are!"

"Shut up!" Victoria hissed, avoiding the stares of, well, pretty much the entire classroom at this point. "That's not what I'm doing. What a narcissistic thing to assume."

Her sneer really didn't go well with her face. She had a kind of modern beauty, Max could admit that she was good-looking. Pretty eyes, a nice jawline that went well with her pixie-cut. The nasty glare she was sporting kind of spoiled it. 

"Well, asking the amount of what _I_ cost sounds like prostitution." Max could be rude too damnit. That was rude, right? Totally. Kate would probably gasp in a scandalized manner if she saw. 

"I'm not trying to fuck you." The Queen Bitch deadpanned. "I...need something from you."

"Like what?" Max prodded, curious despite herself. 

"I need," Victoria was being awfully slow and dramatic. "For you to pretend to date me."

"...What."

"I'll pay."

"You are trying to buy me, what the hell-"

"It isn't like you'd do it for free!"

What the actual shit was happening? Max's brain wasn't built to understand the bitchy complexity that is Victoria Chase. She'd never even said a _word_ to Max, nor an insult until today, and now she just strolls over and tries to basically buy Max. Universe, God, whatever's controlling the way things go, you are one confusing motherfucker. 

"No." Max replied simply.

"Why the hell not?" Victoria clearly didn't expect to be shot down. Ah, the woes of being a spoiled-ass rich kid.

"Because I don't wanna." Max said cheerfully, giving a shit-eating grin up at the girl.

Victoria was silent. Face red, probably from irritation instead of embarrassment, she looked at Max's camera sitting on her desk like she was planning on setting fire to it. Max resisted the urge to cradle it protectively against her chest. After a moment or four of silence, it was beginning to get awkward.

"What if I said I'd pay you five-hundred dollars?" 

Max's eyes widened comically, and if she had been drinking something, an epic spit-take would've surely gone down. _Five hundred dollars._ That's...Her mind couldn't process the amount of money she was being offered to 'pretend date' someone. That could buy a _lot_ of film. Polaroid's were fucking expensive when it came to that. She could buy Kate that huge rabbit cage she'd been wanting for her bunny, she could...

But she couldn't, because she wasn't taking the deal. 

"What about a thousand?" Max asked instead of turning her down immediately, mostly just wanting to fuck with her.

"Fine."

Well then. Once again, if Max had any liquid in her mouth, it'd currently be all over her desk and Victoria's chimmy choo's. 

"Look, Caulfield," Leaning down so she could be quieter, Victoria spoke when it was clear that Max wasn't going to reply. "Would you just consider it? I'll pay two-thousand if you're really that reluctant."

Mr. Jefferson walked in while Max was still trying to fully comprehend the situation she was in. 

"Come to my dorm room if you're interested." Victoria returned to her desk without another word, and wow did that sound like an innuendo if Max has ever heard one.

Max _was_ interested. As sad as it was, she needed the money. Asking her parents for extra when it was needed wasn't an option, so this would help greatly. She still wasn't taking the offer! Max was just interested in why Victoria would even want to do something ridiculous like that. Yep. Totally.

 

She was ashamed to say that she ended up at Victoria's door as soon as her last class ended. 

Max knocked twice briefly, deciding she'd only wait a minute for Victoria to answer the door. Then she could book it back to her room and pretend this never happened. The door flung open not a second later, like she'd been waiting or something. But that was preposterous. 

Victoria was practically radiating smugness, staring down at Max with a smirk. Damn those two inches she had on her in height. Damn them to hell. 

"So you are interested, hm?" The words were practically purred, Jesus Christ. 

"Yeah, just rub it in, why don'cha?" Max sighed. Victoria's smugness didn't wane, and she opened the door wider and stepped aside to let Max enter. She complied after a moment of hesitation. No need to be scared, it was just Victoria. All barks and bitching and no actual biting.

Shutting the door, Victoria practically _strode_ over to her bed and sat down, acting like she owned the place or something. Well, she did, actually. Max just stood there, feeling every bit as awkward as she had this morning with Victoria. She really did have a knack for making people uncomfortable, didn't she?

"You can sit, you know." Victoria rolled her eyes. "I don't bite."

Max sat down at the edge of her bed stiffly. She didn't bother to reply. 

"So, you're interested, right?" Victoria broke the silence again. 

"I....guess." Max admitted. "I still don't plan on accepting, but why would you want to offer me that _outrageous_ amount of money just to 'pretend date' you?"

It sounded even sadder when she said it out loud. Victoria didn't have many friends, besides that Nathan kid who people avoided because he had a habit of going on rants at random and also being a douchebag. Was she really desperate enough to pay someone to give her attention?

"Because," Victoria avoid Max's eyes, smugness gone and replaced with embarrassment. "I....want to be more popular, okay?"

"Well..." Victoria glanced up at her, clearly wanting to hear a yes. "That's shallow as all hell."

Max stared at her, praying that she could realize the stupidity of this entire fucking situation. Was she really willing to pay someone thousands of dollars for popularity. Was this actually happening, oh my god.

"Wanting friends isn't shallow." Victoria said softly, and wow, she was going for the pity card now, wasn't she. "I have a grand fucking total amount of one friend, no one talks to me, no one even likes me."

"And so dating me will somehow make you Miss Popularity?" Max asked sarcastically. 

"You have the most friends."

"So?"

"So, everyone _likes_ you, dumbass! If you dated me, then they'd have to give me a chance. And maybe even eventually like me."

"That's your plan?" Max wanted to laugh, but also kind of wanted to bang her head against a wall from the sheer audacity of it. "Instead of actually trying to talk to people and make friends the right way, you're wanting to do this and you're willing to pay 2 grand for it?"

"Yes." Was the immediate reply. 

This was ridiculous. This was stupid. This had about a one-in-million chance of actually working. And the concept of it was shallow and idiotic. But...

The money. There was a lot of it. Was it worth pretending to be Victoria Chase's girlfriend for god knows how long? Max didn't like her, but watching her plan crash and burn would still make her feel bad. Max accepting this solely for the money would be as shallow as Victoria's plan in the first place.

"Deal." 

"Really?" Victoria's eyes were wide like she couldn't believe what Max had just accepted. Max couldn't really believe it either. 

"Yeah. But," Max was a terrible human being. "I'm giving you a month. That's all."

"Sure, fine, I don't care." Victoria was the happiest Max had ever seen her. She was even _smiling_ , holy fuck. 

"Wanna shake on it, Caulfield?" Victoria held out her hand, smirking slyly. 

"Fuck you." 

"Maybe later."


	2. In Which Victoria Calls Max a Turd

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And its updated finally!!! I actually finished this chap the other day, buttt I have no wifi rn so :'D this was a bitch to upload using an iphone's hotspot but its finally here! sorry if the chap's confusing :'D

"What the fuc-..." Max took a deep breath. "What's this?"

"My plan, can't you read?" The ice queen herself scoffed from where she perched on her bed, relaxed as ever. Why, oh why, did she not make her room their 'meeting spot'? It would still be awkward, but at least Max would feel better in her own room. 

"Yes, I'm indeed literate." Don't crumple the cursed piece of paper in your hand, Max, resist temptation- "But what I'd like to know is why you _planned_ our entire 'relationship' from start to finish?"

"So you wouldn't fuck up around people and blow the entire thing, duh."

Max was going to pop a blood vessel. She was sitting on the edge of the bed, as far from her as possible, and yet it didn't help a damn thing. This shit was too much already and they haven't even taken their fake relationship to the public. Why did she even agree to come to Victoria's room when she demanded that she do via texting? Oh, yeah, because she'd agreed to basically become Victoria's bitch. Or girlfriend. It's really the same thing when it comes to Victoria anyway. The blonde hadn't offered a single greeting when she'd answered the door, just shoved the damn piece of paper in her hands and returned to her bed to bask in her smug cloud of bitchiness. Did that even make sense? Probably not. Nothing made sense with Victoria. 

"I'm kind of starting to dislike you." Her voice was bland. Victoria didn't reply, so Max's eyes skimmed the paper. 

- _They're in the courtyard. Sitting side-by-side on the grass in front of at least twenty or so people. Max takes out her cheap pair of earphones, and shyly offers Victoria one earbud to listen to a hipster band and Victoria smiles, taking the offered earbud and putting it in her left ear, Max doing the same with her right. The oh-so-hipster sounds of Alt-J fill their ears as their hands link when they know that people are watching_ -

"The fuck?"

"What, words too complicated for you?"

"Why is this written in some kind of...." Max tried to find the right word. "Fanfiction-y format?"

"Because I want to make you cringe." And there's the shit-eating grin Max didn't miss.

"Oh, fuck you." 

"Check the seventh paragraph for that."

Mortified, Max's eyes betrayed her and looked down at the paper again. It only had five paragraphs. Victoria laughed as Max gritted her teeth at the utter and complete frustration that was spending more than five minutes with Victoria Chase.

"I hate you."

"Feeling's mutual, _ma biche."_

Max rolled her eyes. She didn't know what the last part meant, but it was probably an insult.

"You don't even speak french."

"I've taken French class for the past three years, Caulfield." Victoria frowned at her. "And that was a term of endearment, so there's no need to get your panties in a bunch, _crotte_."

"Whatever." Max was a broken woman. "So, is this plan actually serious or was it just made entirely to mess with me?"

"Both." Victoria snatched the paper away from her like she'd rip it or something. She probably would've to be honest. "I don't trust your acting skills, so I'll take the lead in all the cutesy relationship things."

"So I'm supposed to just follow along to whatever you do, no questions asked?" Max asked, incredulous.

"Yep." Victoria yawned like Max was boring her, which she probably was, and raised her arms above her head in a long, languid stretch. Max refused to question why her eyes went to the sliver of bare torso that showed when her shirt rode up. 

Victoria acted a bit different when just Max was around, she noticed. More relaxed. A lot less uptight too. Did that mean she was relaxed enough around Max to be herself? She was still a raging bitch though, so maybe not. Max wasn't sure which Victoria she disliked more, the uptight bitch or the relaxed and still pretty bitchy Victoria. 

"People aren't going to like you if it looks like you're totally in control of me, you know." Max shrugged. "But, hey, if you wanna fuck up your thousand-dollar plan, then feel free."

Max hated the idea of following Victoria around like a lovestruck puppy and obeying her every command, but she feigned indifference.

"You're exactly right." Victoria said, and what the hell was she actually agreeing- "It is _my_ thousand dollar plan, so how about you don't question it, Caulfield?"

Nevermind. 

"....When do we start?" She almost didn't want to ask.

"Monday." That was two days away, holy fuck she wasn't ready. "I'll give you half the money then, and the rest after the month's over."

Feeling like the worst person alive, Max just nodded.

"This is your last chance, though."

"Last chance to what?" Max asked, eyebrow raised. 

"Back out." Victoria's stare was making her somewhat uncomfortable. "So I'm going to ask you, one last time. Are you positive you want to do this?"

Max felt like maybe she should be asking Victoria that exact question. She hesitated, eyes firmly on Victoria's probably-overpriced comforter. Was she sure she wanted to do this? Is she this shallow enough to actually accept?

"I'm sure."

_Goddamnit, Max._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TRANSLATIONS:
> 
>  _Ma biche_ : My doe (Victoria's corny asf)
> 
>  _Crotte_ : feces (YES SHE CALLED MAX A TURD OK)


	3. In Which Max's taste in underwear is a Little Boring

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> and so the kinda unneccessary filler chapter is hereeeee!! 
> 
> I don't really know if this chapter is good or not because I wrote most of it at 5AM sooo \\_(ツ)_/¯
> 
> But also!!!! I wanna give full credit to my best bro Nanoushka for the french translations :D!! Without her, I'd be using google translate and god knows how that always goes. TYSM once again, my bilingual broski <333
> 
>  
> 
> (Highkey tho her fics are awesome and hella gay so I definitely recommend checking her out: http://archiveofourown.org/users/Nanoushka/pseuds/Nanoushka/works )

Max was at a state of maximum comfyness right now. She was somewhere in that spectrum of being somewhat alseep and somewhat awake, and it was _nice_. Not asleep enough to be unaware, and not awake enough to worry about how today was the day that she officially becomes Victoria's bitch. Nope, no worrying. Yet.

Pulling her blanket more securely around her shoulders, Max felt herself drifting off again...

 

_Vrrrr_

Max shifted a little.

_Vrrrrrrrrr!_

Eyebrows scrunching, she turned over and curled in the fetal position.

_VRRRRRRRRRR!!!!_

"The hell?" She finally muttered, voice hoarse. The vibrating continued, and her hand fumbled for her phone. Fuck, where did she leave it...

It vibrated again, and she realized she felt the vibrations to the left of her cheek. The fucker was under her pillow. Fingers closing around the phone, Max sat up and turned it on. She was immediately blinded by the screen brightness. Max blinked rapidly and repeated a few choice curses in her head before turning the screen brightness way, way down. Then she noticed the number of messages she had. 

Ten? What the hell? Did something happen? Opening her messages, she braced herself.

[Victoria @5:46AM: come to my room right now]

[Victoria @5:47AM: and be dressed in something vaguely presentable so i can be seen with u 2day]

[Victoria @5:54AM: an answer would be nice, caulfield]

[Victoria @5:59AM: are you still asleep]

[Victoria @6:04AM: earth to hippie!]

[Victoria @6:02AM: caulfield]

[Victoria @6:07AM: hipster]

[Victoria @6:08AM: mon amour}

[Victoria @6:09AM: princesse]

[Victoria @6:11AM: hey, oh jolie tas d'merde, hOW ABOUT ANSWERING UR MESSAGES THAT'D BE NICE]

Max sighed. It was too early for this. Out of curiousity, she copied the last bits of french she'd typed and put it into google translate. It translated to something about feces and love. Well, either that was very innacurate or Victoria had a fetish. 

[Me @6:13AM: Why do you need me to come to your room?]

The reply was almost instant. 

[Victoria @6:13AM: IT AWAKENS.]

Another message came before she could reply. 

[Victoria @6:14AM: because i need to make sure you look presentable, duh]

[Me @6:15AM: You aren't my mother, you can calm tf down.]

Max typed again quickly in case she got spammed with rants again for being snarky.

[Me @6:15AM: but fine, whatever. Can you just come to my room instead?]

[Victoria @6:16AM: i bet it smells like gym socks and hipster body-spray]

[Victoria @6:16AM: ill be there in a second]

When she said a second, she really meant it apparently, because she was at Max's door no more than thirty seconds later. 3 brief, hard knocks that somehow conveyed her annoyed impatience. Impressive. Max yawned, walking over to her door and opening it slowly just to be annoying. There, the wannabe popularity Princess stood. Immaculately dressed too. Not a hair out of place or one damn button left unbuttoned on that expensive-looking cashmere. Way to make Max feel even more inadequate. Well, she did have a plant, something that Victoria didn't have in her room. So that's....something.

"Caulfield." Victoria's stare looked more like a glare. Probably because it was. 

"Hmm?" Max hummed, moving aside to let her in. Fuck articulate replies in the morning.

"Why the fuck are you in your Pajamas?"

"Huh?" She looked down at herself and wow, yep, she completely forgot the whole 'change before Victoria gets here' thing. Whoops."...Oh."

Victoria's glare didn't lessen. 

"I forgot to change." Like that wasn't obvious.

"Really? I hadn't noticed." Victoria facepalmed. She actually facepalmed at Max. "Jesus, Just get dressed."

"Now?"

"No, tomorrow." She said sarcastically. "Yes, _now_. Strip."

Max stared at her. It's the first day of their fake-relationship-thing-whatever, and she's already being overwhelmed and sexually harrassed.

"Not with you watching!"

"No need to be self-conscious, we're both girls here." That leer looked downright terrifying on Victoria's face. "But fine, I'll turn around."

She did just that, tapping her foot impatiently all the while. Max grumbled to herself and walked to the closet after a moment. What would Victoria deem 'appropriate'? A T-shirt would probably get the boot immediately. An unwashed hoodie might just make her call off the thing altogether. So Max settled on a button-up that happened to be a nice plaid color, and some jeans. Would boots be too casual? Did Max even own boots? Would Victoria approve? Why did she even care? So many questions that would go unanswered.

Max took a quick peek behind her. Victoria was still turned away. So she quickly slipped her shirt off. It might be gross, but she didn't bother changing her bra. For one, she wasn't about to have the goods out and about with Victoria fucking Chase in the room, and two, she was just plain lazy. 

"Wow, grey? That's boring."

"Huh?" Max replied, confused. Wait...She glance down. Her bra is grey. 

_Oh my god_. Max peeked again, face red as hell, and Victoria wasn't turned away anymore. No, she was actually staring. Very obviously at Max's chest. 

And that was how Victoria ended up getting a worn converse shoe thrown at her face. 

"Wha-" Victoria dodged the shoe, and it hit the wall with a bang. "Why the hell did you do that?!"

"Why the hell were _you_ staring at my chest?" Max fired back, hurredly buttoning up her shirt while Victoria was distracted. "Turn back around, jesus!"

"I wasn't!" Kate would wash her mouth out with soap for being a _liar_. Max hurredly put on the jeans after Victoria turned around again. No need in her seeing _that_ too.

"You were!" Deep breaths, Caulfield. "I literally caught you staring, Victoria."

"Lies and vicious rumors." She sniffed. "Can I turn around now?"

"Gonna perv on my elbow too if I say yes?" Max asked, half-serious. 

Victoria didn't bother answering. Turning around, she gave Max a long once-over that made her feel more than a little self-conscious.

"It'll do." She said finally. Max was really swimming in the praise. Victoria had the best compliments, really, she sure did know how to make her (fake) girlfriend feel special. "Now come on, it's past 6:30."

"Fine." Max sighed and raked a hand through her hair. Who needs brushing when you've got fingers, right? "But I have a question first."

"Well? Out with it." 

"Can my room be our meeting place-base-thing?" She asked. 

"Why?" Victoria asked, eyebrow raised. Even her eyebrows were on point, goddamnit.

"Because I like my room better than yours?" Honesty was the best policy.

"Charming." Victoria sneered. "Sure, I don't care. Seeing your pathetic excuse for a living space makes me feel more comfortable about my lack popularity anyway. Now can we please go?"

"Well since you asked so nicely," Max mumbled sarcastically, putting the strap of her bag around her shoulder and grabbing her phone. Victoria and her walked, side-by-side, down the dorm hallway and out the door. The courtyard was full of students either half-asleep or trying their best to shovel down breakfast as fast as possible before they had to go to class. They all stared when Victoria and Max were in sight. 

Max jumped when Victoria suddenly grabbed her hand. She almost tried to snatch it back on reflex, but held back. This was part of the plan. Just follow whatever Victoria does and don't question it or complain. No matter how frustrating and slightly degrading it was. 

Max was already ready for this to be over with.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TRANSLATIONS:
> 
>  _Princesse_ : Princess
> 
>  _Mon Amour_ : My love 
> 
> _Jolie Tas D'Merde_ : Lovely Piece Of Shit


	4. In which Max is Regretting this Already

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Wow i cant believe it took me a month and some change to update this im so sorry
> 
> i had more than half the chapter written in early december butttt i kinda lost motivation and my life is kinda not too good right now :'D my laptop got stepped on and is now cracked severely, my phone's broken, and im moving and ive been kinda depressed lately 
> 
> so yeah :') but im in a strangely good mood right now so i figured why not update this finally?

They both somehow made it to class without Max's hand falling off from being gripped too tightly, or Max just screaming "NOPE." at the top of her lungs and then running all the way back to Seattle so she wouldn't have to face Victoria Chase anymore. Fortunately, neither of those possibilities came to light. Max walked through the courtyard and tried to give a smile to the many, many people staring. 

Victoria's steel grip on her poor fingers forced Max from her dorm, all the way to her first period. She and Victoria didn't share that class, thank god. Max stood at the door of the classroom awkwardly. She couldn't exactly move yet. Victoria _still_ had her hand. 

"You gonna let me go to class anytime soon?" Max mumbled, flushing slightly when Victoria ran her thumb up and down Max's own a few times. What was the point of that? It wasn't like most, if any, of the students would notice such a small thing. No one had even walked into the classroom and seen them yet! Maybe she was doing it to just get a reaction out of Max. Welp, it was working.

"Patience, Caulfield." Victoria said cheerfully. Damn her. 

"We look stupid just standing here." Max tried not to scowl. 

"We could engage in some PDA if you're up for it."

"Fuck you."

"That's the spirit." The shit-eating grin makes an unsurprising and unwelcome appearance once again. Max didn't dignify her words with a response. 

After a few moments of silence, more students entered the building. Which meant that Max got stared at more. Great. Victoria didn't even fidget under the scrutinizing looks. Who was supposed to be the unpopular one again? Even though it could turn into downright arrogance in a split second, Max had to respect Victoria's confidence. Or envy. Mostly envy.

Victoria let go of her hand. Max was relieved to see that she could still feel her fingers. She was free! Well, for about 50 minutes. Victoria was in her next period. Actually, Victoria was in about four of her periods, damn it.

"I have to be going now," Max was confused as to why Victoria actually looked sad, until she realized that they'd basically attracted a small crowd. Guess it was time to play it up. " _Au Revoir_ , Maxine."

Max was going to give an awkward goodbye and then book it into the classroom, but Victoria stopped her by leaning in. Max leaned back a fraction. Was she actually trying to...? Max's mind promptly screamed "FUCK NO" as she turned her head. Victoria's lips touched her cheek. At least it wasn't her lips. Max still blushed a bright red and smiled awkwardly at the people _who were still staring._ This felt slightly voyeuristic. The fact that Max couldn't help but notice that Victoria smelled like strawberries wasn't helping her blush fade.

Finally, Victoria leaned back and gave her a smile that could've actually been mistaken for genuine. After her eyes roved over Max's face and settled on her cheek, the smile morphed into more of a smirk, for some reason. With that hell of a goodbye, the wannabe-queen waltzed away to whatever class she had for first period. Max sheepishly walked past the crowd of voyeurs and into her first period. She could've sworn she heard a giggle or two, but brushed it off. It most likely wasn't directed at her.

She'd never been so happy to get straight into chemistry. At least now she could avoid questions from her friends, or even from random nosy strangers. A snicker could be clearly heard from a desk or two behind hers. Once again, she thought nothing of it. 

The teacher, Mrs. Freeda, walked in after a moment. Walking to her desk, she got her clipboard out for roll-call. 

"Alex Hall?"

"Yo,"

"Alyssa Anderson?"

"Present."

"Brooke Scott?"

"Here."

The names went on and on for a while. Max yawned, propping her chin on her palm. You'd think the teachers would be able to recognize who was and wasn't here by now.

"Maxine Caulfield?" Fighting the urge to wrinkle her nose at the use of her full first name, Max responded, "Here." 

The teacher, as she did with most students, glanced up for a moment to make sure it really was Max (Several students had a habit of calling out in place of other students, for no other reason then to be complete dickbags.) and her eyes widened. 

"Maxine, is that...cosmetic choice," What. "On purpose? Is this something the kids are doing these days?"

"Excuse me?" Max smiled nervously. "I'm a little confused, ma'am. Is there something on my face?"

"You didn't know?"

"I...didn't." She could feel her face heating up. "May I be excused to the bathroom, ma'am?" 

The teacher nodded her approval, and Max all but ran out of the classroom and into the bathroom. 

"Now, what the hell is on my face..." Max mutters and looks up to meet her reflection in the mirror. "...Oh my god."

There, on her cheek, was a lipstick print.

It stood out in bold red against her cheek, like a mark of possession. It's no worse than if she wrote ' _Victoria's Bitch <3' in bright, bold cursive on Max's forehead. Maybe that was a little bit of a stretch, but still, this was fucking ridiculous! Max watched her own face pale a few shades, and then flush a startling red in a matter of seconds. _

She was going to fucking _kill_ Victoria Chase.

After ten minutes of rigorous scrubbing, she returned to the classroom. Her cheek was rubbed red from trying to get the lipstick off, and her flush was just as pronounced.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> it isnt nearly as good as it could be but at this point i just wanted to be able to continue it :') and
> 
> this is completely unrelated but oh my g o d that ahs hotel finale was a m azing!!! Liz was awesome and sally and i really loved the way it ended!! i gotta say lady gaga was an amazing actress and this season was actually pretty great imo :DD 
> 
> ok sorry i had to rant for a min sorry to all the people who dont like/watch ahs


	5. In Which Victoria's Tsundere is Showing

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm already updating!! because it's 1am and im hella lonely and worried about something :') so why not write?

Max decided about ten minutes into her first period that she couldn't wait till second period to yell at Victoria about the lipstick thing. So she'd just sneak her phone out and yell at her like that. Text-yell, or something. She quickly pulled her phone out of her pocket and snuck it under her desk. 

[Me @7:28AM: i hate u so much}

Wasn't the more grammar-driven texts she usually did, but she was trying not to get caught. She raised an eyebrow when she got a reply almost immediately. Was Victoria waiting for her incoming rant-texting or something? Couldn't be. 

[Victoria @7:29AM: was wondering when you'd notice]

[Me @7:32AM: i didnt notice. the teacher did. actually the entire class noticed before i did]

[Victoria @7:34AM: oh my god poor you]

[Victoria @7:34AM: jk im laughing at u at this very moment]

Max was going to type a short, sweet, and sarcastic reply, but she was interrupted a firm call of, "Maxine, what is it that you think you're doing?"

 _Fuck._

"Hm?" She looked up innocently. "Nothing, Ma'am."

The teacher pursed her lips. Max was fully prepared to take a nice ol' trip to the princepal's office, but Mrs. Freeda merely sighed. 

"You're a good student, so I'll let this slide." Oh, thank god. "Just don't let me catch you with your phone out again, or there will be consequences, Maxine."

"I won't." Max smiled sheepishly. "Thank you, ma'am."

She put her phone away and didn't bother trying to reply to Victoria. The Popularity Princess could wait 30 minutes or so. 

The rest of class went by relatively alright. Max still didn't grasp half the material that was taught, but that wasn't surprising. Chemistry was Warren's shtick, not hers. Max wasn't the most colorful crayon in the box in general, or however that saying goes. Her grades weren't _bad_ , just average. A few C's and B's. Now that she thought about it, most of the things about herself were really average. Common haircut, bland clothing style, average grades...

And yet, most people got along with her. Just proves that being nice can get you pretty far in life. At least people like Victoria aren't popular. The stereotypical rich-bitch bully being popular sounded like the cliche to end all cliches. Max didn't acknowledge the fact that referring to Victoria as a bitch made her feel slightly guilty. 

She was pulled away from her daydreaming by the shrill sound of the bell. Most students practically ran out, which was weird. They'd just have to go to another boring class, so why rush? Highschoolers were weird as hell.

Max got up and grabbed her bag, fetching her phone from it. She raised an eyebrow when she saw several texting notifications. Either it was Warren, wanting to geek out about something or Victoria decided to spam her again. She glanced down at the texts as she walked out of the classroom and into her next. 

[Victoria @7:36AM: ur lucky anyway. that lipstick costs more than your entire outfit.]

[Victoria @7:42AM: the silent treatment, caulfield? never thought youd be the petty type]

[Victoria @7:47AM: next time ill make sure to leave something else on you, just a little more permanent >;)]

[Victoria @7:49AM: that was a hickie joke but you obvs dont get it so idk why I bothered]

[Victoria @7:53AM: caulfield]

[Victoria @7:55AM: ...]

[Victoria @7:56AM: I'm sorry.]

[Victoria @7:59AM: I rly am. i shouldnt have put the mark on you in the first place so i guess im sorry.]

[Victoria @8:02AM: so now that ive apologized, can you please quit ignoring your girlfriend??]

Max felt a strange, warm feeling as she read over the texts one more time. Victoria thought she was mad at her and actually apologized? She'd also called herself Max's girlfriend, holy shit. Instead of feeling repulsed like she _should_ , Max's cheeks reddened slightly and she almost smiled before she remembered that this was Victoria, the bitch who was using Max to buy her way into popularity. Not her cutesy girlfriend. Max ignored the treacherous part of her brain that reminded her how shallow it was to accept Victoria's offer because of the money. Now's not the time, brain. 

Victoria was totally being sarcastic when she used 'girlfriend' anyway. Max was getting blinded by her good looks and unexpected apology. Totally. Definitely. 

She started typing out her reply.

Backspace. Type. Backspace again. 

Why was this so hard? Max stopped and settled by her locker so she could concentrate on the texting without bumping into someone. 

[Me @8:07AM: I wasn't ignoring you. The teacher caught me.]

She bit her lip, hesitant.

[Me @8:08AM: Your girlfriend accepts your apology.]

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i googled 'most expensive lipstick products' just so i can have vic be a smartass :D but all i got was some forty-dollar mac lipstick and a list of the most expensive cosmetic products (over a 1000$ for some gold eyelashes jesus christ)
> 
> also, oh shit vic your tsundere is showing holy fuck put that away--


	6. In Which a Vagina Joke is Made

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> the feedback for this is so insanely nice and sweet so its hard to not update hella soon aight sue me
> 
> (srsly tho thank u to all the people who left kudos/commented bc its really nice and makes me smile so damn hard)
> 
> ENOUGH WITH THE SAPPY SPEECH ITS TIME FOR TSUNDERE LESBOS

Was sending that a mistake? Would Victoria understand that it was a joke? 

...

 _Was_ it a joke? 

Max scowled down at her phone like it was the object of her distress. Pocketing it, she continued down the hall to her next class that she shared with Victoria. She was still mostly unhappy about that little fact, which is a good thing. She hasn't been enthralled completely by Victoria's bitchy ways and good-looks. Or something. Fuck, she really didn't make much sense in the morning. She didn't feel her phone vibrate in her pocket at all. Victoria probably laughed out loud at her text and screenshotted it for future teasing and blackmail.

Max took a deep breath as she walked into second period. The morning hand-holding and first period weren't shit. This is where the real hell of being Victoria's bitch began. 

She grimaced when she saw the ice queen herself, perched right in the desk next to hers. Hopefully the teacher would see her once they got to the classroom and move her into her assigned seat. Max tried to look vaguely happy and went to sit in her seat. Surprisingly, Victoria just offered her a small smile. 

The hell? Was she being subtle about it or something? Not that Max was complaining. It was helluva lot better than Victoria jumping out of her seat and saying something really dramatic and unrealistic and embarrassing herself and Max. 

Max's phone vibrated in her pocket, and she raised an eyebrow when she took it out and saw she had a text from Warren. Who was in her second period. Why would he need to text her when he could just walk over...?

[Warren @8:13AM: Why is everyone saying you're dating Victoria? WHY IS SHE SITTING NEXT TO YOU TOO WHAT THE HELL.]

[Me @8:14AM: Because I am dating her.]

She figured that part of their deal was not telling anyone about the little fact that this relationship is completely fake.

[Warren @8:14AM: 3rfkjjfksjfjel]

[Warren @8:14AM: WHAT]

Max resisted the urge to roll her eyes (fondly, of course) and looked over at Warren's seat where he looked like he was on the verge of a mild heart attack.

[Me @8:16AM: Yep, I'm a total sucker for the pussy.]

[Me @8:16AM: Victoria's cat is the cutest, I mean.]

She didn't usually stoop low enough to make _vagina_ puns, but Warren was fun to mess with. She almost cracked up when Warren dropped his phone.

[Warren @8:17AM: I'm gonna stop texting you now because this conversation is becoming too much for me.]

[Me @8:18AM: ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) ]

Max pockets her phone again and looks over at Victoria. Who's staring at her.

"Um." She tried to go for a teasing smirk and it probably looked like she had to take a shit. "You need something, babe?"

It felt really unnatural coming from her mouth, but she hoped it read as confident and flirty instead of nervous and slightly repulsed. She bet Warren was having a nervous breakdown by now.

"No." Well, Rude. "Wait! Yeah, I actually do need something."

"What is it?" Max asked, genuinely curious.

"Your love." She said, and several students turned their head towards the both of them with confused expressions. Max flushed red all the way to the tips of her ears and wished she could rewind time or something. Then maybe she could, yknow, not be the shallowest person to ever live and accept the deal in the first place. But wait, two could play at this game.

"I thought you'd know by now that you already have it." She batted her eyelashes for good measure. An overwhelming and immature feeling of victory settled inside her when Victoria's face went slightly red. Way, way less than her previous blush, but goddamn it, it was still something.

"You're right." Victoria leaned over. Max tried not to lean back instinctively. "Especially since you said it so many times last night. Well, screamed it, actually."

Max's brain was now too mortified to process much, if anything, but she thought she distantly heard the sound of Warren choking on his own spit.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> "No." Well, Rude. "Wait! Yeah, I actually do need something."
> 
> "What is it?" Max asked, genuinely curious.
> 
> "That pussy."
> 
>  
> 
> ^what i legit typed at first and almost shit myself from laughing too hard


	7. In which Max is kinda Thirsty, whoops.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay, so I'm moving today. In an hour or so, anndd im dreading it. My moodswings are going wild and ive felt not okay lately but i figured id go ahead and upload this! Sorry for the wait :') I always have over half the chap written, look back on it, and think its terrible and backspace on everything so it takes me a while to be happy enough with what ive written to submit it.

Max honestly hadn't felt this much out of her element in a long time. The last time she remembered being genuinely nervous and unsure was her first day at Blackwell. Even that had quickly evaporated once she'd talked to a few people, and realized that there wasn't any bullying bullshit that she'd had to deal with for years. Now, though, she was in uncharted territory. It made her feel strange; a sort of queasy, reluctant excitment and some embarrassment. She hated it.

Class started, thank god, so she got a moment of peace. She still felt eyes on her pretty often, but it was easier to deal with than Victoria's cheesy pick-up lines that actually weren't necessary, because weren't they supposed to already be in a relationship? Shit, this was confusing.

Zoning out whatever the teacher had been going on about, Max glanced over at Warren. He still looked a little pale in the face and Max had to hold in a grin. Her eyes fell on Victoria next.

She hadn't moved from her seat next to Max's, and Max couldn't bring herself to mind. Since the teacher walked in, Victoria hadn't even done anything else. She actually looked like she was paying attention, to Max's surprise. Brains and beauty? 

Max had to think that if Victoria wasn't such a _dick_ , then she would probably be popular. Look at Max, for instance. Average grades, slightly-less-than-average-looks, and she was well-liked. 

Victoria's eyes met hers, and it took Max a minute to realize she'd been caught staring. Red, red lips curled into a smirk, and she winked at Max. Max looked away immediately. 

Thankfully, not much happened for the rest of the class. Max got called on and didn't even know what the teacher had been talking about, but besides that, all was peaceful. 

It wasn't until the bell rang that things started to go straight to shit.

Max got up from her seat and flinged her bag around her shoulder. Victoria didn't get up, it was more like she rose gracefully from hers and set her designer bookbag daintily around her shoulder. Max had never felt so inadequate about the way she got up from a desk and carried her bag before.

Victoria was fiddling with something on her phone, so Max waited impatiently for her to hurry up and walk with her to the next class. Couples did that, right? Totally.

Victoria was _still_ on her phone. Max cleared her throat, and Victoria finally looked up at her, already glaring like it was an automatic response. The glare shifted to one of slight surprise.

"What are you still doing here?" She asked, and Max would be surprised at the break in 'cute couple' character if the classroom wasn't empty.

"Waiting for you." Max said slowly. "We walk together, right?"

Something...weird happened next. Victoria's look of mild surprise became complete shock and her cheeks got quite a few shades darker. Maybe Max was just reading into something that wasn't there, but the blonde looked almost...happy? But then whatever Max saw or imagined was gone.

"Oh, yeah. I was doing something, it must've slipped my mind." The lie would've been completely believable if Victoria hadn't averted her eyes. Max didn't pester her about it anyway, it wasn't like it was her right to. 

"Okay." Max replied. Neither of them moved. "Are we gonna go, or...? Class has probably already started."

"Oh. Yeah, okay, lets go." She said, and wow, this was awkward. They stared at each other for a few seconds, and then awkwardly linked hands like those annoying new couples did and walked out into the hallway.

"Wait, Caulfield." Victoria muttered. "Don't we share this period too?"

"Yeah, why?"

"Our next period is our free period."

"...Oh. I feel very stupid right now."

"You should."

They decided to both just head back to the dorms. Victoria's friend ( _only_ friend, her mind unhelpfully added) was in class and Max honestly just didn't feel like socializing. She could take a small nap, play guitar, or just laze around. That last option was very tempting.

Max jumped when a manicured hand clamped on her arm and someone exclaimed, "Oh my god, I can't believe it!"

Victoria let go of Max's hand and turned around like she was expecting to fight someone and Max did the same, albeit less aggressively, and they were both met with...someone. Max was _pretty_ sure her name was Courtney. 

Max tried to smile at her while Victoria looked like she'd just swallowed an entire lemon. 

"You two _are_ a thing!" She said, like it was astounding news, not taking her hand off of Max's poor forearm. Those french-tipped claws hurt. "I have to text Taylor about this!"

"Is it, ah, that surprising?" Max tried to reply nicely. 

"Well, duh! Everyone and their grandmother's been talking all morning about you two dating! I called bullshit, because YOU'RE Max and she's...." The long pause spoke of her thoughts on Victoria louder than any words could, and Max couldn't help but feel a little offended. What does that mean? That Victoria wasn't good enough? "Well, you're two very different people, I mean. I didn't even know you swung that way, Max." She continued playfully, like her and Max were 'ol buddies, which they were not. 

"Well, you know the old saying, about opposites attracting, haha." Max said and glanced at Victoria from the corner of her eye. Still rocking that 'I just deepthroated several lemons' look. Fantastic.

"You're so, like, wise, Max," She said solemnly like Max had spitted some amazing and original speech instead of an overused saying. "But anyway! When did you two become official?"

"Two days ago-" Max said at the same time Victoria muttered, "A month and three days."

"..."

Ah, awkward silence, welcome back, you unwanted dick.

"Excuse Max, she has a hard time remembering things."Victoria said smoothly, still sporting a slight bitch face. "She'd forget her own ego if I didn't remind her of it."

"Heh..." Courtney laughed awkwardly after a too-long pause. "Yeah, totally. Well, I gotta be going now. See ya, Max!"

She walked away quickly and Max felt a little, tiny, miniscule tinge of irritation. There was no reason to act like that towards Victoria. If she was being a bitch like she usually was, then it'd be different, but she'd barely said anything. Why did people react that way? Did Victoria give off that aura of "STAY THE FUCK AWAY" or something? Max couldn't stand her half the time, sure, but...that bothered her.

Victoria's hand grabbed her own again, and the blonde murmured, "Was she a friend of yours or something? Jesus, you really know how to pick 'em, Caulfield."

They resumed their walking to the dorms while Max replied, "Nope. I think her name's Courtney. You know what though?"

"Hm?"

"We probably need to get to know each other."

"Um, what?" Victoria raised an eyebrow. "Is this some kind of hipster pick-up line? What's next? 'Wanna grow a neckbeard together?' 'How about going to see that new Alt-J concert with me?'"

"Shut up!" Max's face heated. "No, I _meant_ , we need to like...formulate shit about our relationship. How we became friends, when we became official, all that. It couldn't hurt to know other things about each other too, in case people ask. Also, Alt-J's awesome, so don't hate."

"Awesomely hipster, you mean." They were in the courtyard now. Max was so close to doing nothing for an hour. Or about 50 minutes, since they got caught up by Cathy or Charlotte or whoever she was. "But I suppose you're right. If we mess up again with someone who's not a shallow twee like she was, then it could be suspicious."

"Mmhm." Max hummed. Victoria let go of her hand and opened the door to the girl's dorms for her like the true gentlewoman she was pretending to be. There was a silence after that, as they walked through the hallway, but it wasn't an uncomfortable one. Max stopped at her doorway, expecting for Victoria to go back to her own.

She didn't.

The blonde stood beside her, raising an eyebrow when she didn't move or do anything. "Well? Aren't we going to go in?"

"Huh?"

"Your room. The dorm right in front of us. The place you spend most of your time in. The Hipster Hovel. Ring a bell?"

"Yes, I do indeed know my own room." Max gritted her teeth. "I meant, why are you coming?"

"Aren't we doing the thing?"

"What thing?"

"For the love of-" Victoria said, clearly exasperated. "The questions thing, dumbass."

"....Oh." She opened the door without another word. There was really nothing you could say to correct an epic fail such as this. Victoria stepped inside, and Max was pleasantly surprised when she didn't critique her choice in decoration. Max sat on her unmade bed, feeling self-conscious of the state of her room. Her laptop was half-open and on the floor next to an empty bag of chips and a soda (Max had to have some kind of sleep-walking thing, because she didn't remember eating and browsing the internet on the floor, of all places. Sleep-eater-and-browse, or something.), and random photos were spilling from nooks and crannys because she was never willing to throw any away. Event the bad, blurry ones that were just of her weird face. 

Victoria didn't comment on it though. Not even a sneer, wow, was this progress. Max sat down on her bed.

Victoria didn't. 

She just...stood there, in the middle of Max's room, looking slightly out-of-place. Like one of those classy, groomed, and expensive lapdogs being in a dirty pig stall.

"You can sit, y'know." Max patted the spot next to her. 

"I knew that." Victoria snapped, walking over and sitting stiffly next to her. Was she uncomfortable in Max's room or something? It wasn't like she had a reason to be, but who knows. Victoria's way of thinking was fucking weird.

"I'm sure." Max yawned. Damn, she just realized that she wouldn't be able to take a nap. Even fake relationships were nothing but goddamn trouble. "Wanna go ahead and start this?"

"Yes. We only have about 45 minutes, so lets make the most of this." Was it just Max's mind, or did that sound kind of dirty? Victoria and herself, desperately trying to get down to business quickly, so they wouldn't be late to class...

Max needed to chill. Probably get some water too, because she was being so, so thirsty. Next she'd be asking Victoria if she'd rather just Netflix and chill.

"Um, alright." Max bit her lip. "How should we start?"

"Maybe with how we became friends? I already have a great idea for that one."

"What is it?"

"Okay, so, use all your ability to envision this. I'm walking to the showers. It's morning, and I really need to hurry or I'll be late. So I go in, and I think it's clear. I pull open the curtain to a random shower, and you're there, naked as the day you were born. You blush, and it's cute, so I-"

"Wait, wait!" Max interrupted loudly. "Is this how we became friends or an intro to a lesbian porno?"

"Let me _finish_ and you'll find out." That definitely shut Max the hell up.

"So I, calmly pulling the curtain shut again, apologize profusely." Max couldn't imagine Victoria apologizing at all, let alone profusely. "And you forgive me, obviously, and we talk for a minute."

"...And?" Max gestured for her to go on. 

"That's it."

"What? You can't start with something like that and then end on such a boring note!"

"It wasn't boring, you uncultured spork! Did you _want_ it to end like a lesbian porno?"

Well. She didn't _not_ want it to end like a lesbian porno.

"No!" Max sputtered like the filthy liar she was. 

"Denial doesn't look good on you, Caulfield."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The only things I have planned for this fic:
> 
> -Max calling Victoria 'Vicky' or 'Tori'
> 
> -Victoria wearing Max's clothes. Don't ask me how this will happen but bygod I'm gonna do it because yes.
> 
> -Cute, uncertain first kiss. (Or sex if I decide to go in the smut direction ;D)
> 
> -Max photographing Victoria.
> 
> -C O N F E S S I O N.
> 
> That is all. I wing every chapter tbh.
> 
> (also max is so hard to write ngl but i try my best! (funfact: i wrote this entire thing in one sitting while listening to a opm yaoi playlist. yes.) 
> 
> Im thinking about writing a chap in Vic's POV, but i dunno.)


	8. In Which Max is Already Whipped

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> aaa this took a minute and then some jesus christ im sorry 
> 
> this was a pain to write so idfk if its good but ay. i tried. (that seems to be my catchphrase lately ;n;)
> 
> its prolly bc ive been reading soooo many good fics lately and it makes me selfconscious of my writing but ill get over it.
> 
> (next chap will have actual...stuff happen in it i promise. this was p much all dialogue ;D;)

"Can we please change the topic?" Max asks, because really, she wasn't in the mood to argue about her maybe-possible-kinda attraction to Victoria when they're supposed to be learning the ins-and-outs of their relationship. 

"Fine. But only because we have to be back in class in forty minutes and we need to finish this. I'll get you next time."

"I bet. So, uh. How does the..." She gestures. "Start?"

"The what?"

"The civil war." She answers sarcastically. "Our relationship, genius."

"No need to be a smartass." Victoria leans back slightly, seeming to relax since the minute she's stepped foot in Max's room. "I did the last thing, so you come up with this one."

Shit. Max's never been known to be creative much. Or at all. And with the way their friendship started, it'd have to be pretty interesting; not overly so, though. It'd just seem fake then.

"Um....Maybe...It's about a month or so after we became friends, and...I just, uh." Max racks her brain for something, _anything_. The way Victoria looks interested in what she's saying really isn't helping her any. "I ask you on a date? And it goes well. So we become official."

"I guess that isn't too bad." Victoria admits.

"Really?"

"Well, it isn't like people are going to ask us to go in depth about it." Max wasn't so sure. There were some voyeuristic ass people at Blackwell. "The only thing that probably wouldn't be believable is that you're the one to make the first move."

"Hah, you'd probably passive-aggressively hint about it for a week or two before I took the bait and asked you." Max teases. "In a kind of 'I really wanna be something to you but I dunno how to say it, so I'll just be a total dick instead' you know?"

Victoria's weirdly silent for a minute. Max raises a questioning brow, and if she was a perceptive person, she'd be sure that Victoria looked guilty. She had no clue why though.

"Whatever." Victoria finally replies, and damn it, there's an awkward tension hanging in the air now. Max's phone buzzes, and she sees it's a message from Kate. 

[Kate@9:25AM: I've heard some...interesting things about you and a certain someone today.]

It's followed by a smirk emoji, because Kate really liked showing how she felt with little iPhone characters. Max didn't get it, but hey. She didn't get most things.

"Who're you texting?" Victoria asks curiously. 

"Kate." Max replies absentmindedly, starting to type out a reply.

[Me@9:26AM: Is it scandalous?]

[Kate@9:27AM: Of course! But really, are you two actually a thing?]

[Me@9:29AM: Yep. I'm actually doing something with her right now, so I gotta go. TTYL.]

[Kate@9:32AM: You don't realize how bad that sounds.] Insert blush emoji.

That settles it, Kate is secretly the naughtiest of their entire group. Not exactly hard to do, considering Max is...well, herself, and Warren had major word vomit when a cute girl so much as smiled at him. It'd happened with a few guys too, which she probably needed to ask about. Maybe they both swung for both teams. All they needed to do was get Kate to come to the bisexual side and they'd be the...bisexual...bitches? Bi buds? Nevermind. There was no way to make that sound cool. Max pocketed her phone and looked up to see Victoria fishing something from her bag. The 'something' was a mirror.

"Conceited much?" Max wasn't being serious. She just really liked fucking with Victoria, for some reason. 

"Can't be conceited when you look this good, Caulfield." God. "Plus, you don't know how easy it is to smear something when you actually bother wearing makeup." Well, gee. Max might need some ice for that burn. 

Victoria studied her reflection in the mirror with a critical eye, using a manicured index finger to wipe away any imperfections that Max really didn't see. 

"Caulfield, get my bag." Max obeyed without question, and wow, that was a little concerning. It was day 1 and she was already whipped. "Get my lipstick."

"You're trusting me to go through your bag? Don't I feel special." It was mostly sarcastic. Mostly.

"Do I need to be concerned about you stealing something?" 

"Not really." Because she really didn't. Max was a lot of things, good and bad, but she wasn't a thief.

"That reminds me. Give me my wallet too." Not bothering to ask why, Max complies, handing over the lipstick and _hella_ expensive looking wallet. She blinks when a bundle of bills were shoved in her hand after Victoria finishes touching up her lipstick.

"Wh-" Max glanced down at the money, confused, and her jaw nearly dropped when she saw it was ten and twenty dollar bills. She's pretty sure she spotted a hundred, and feels a little faint. "What's this?"

"Your payment, what do you think?" Victoria looks at her like she's stupid. Max doesn't reply, still pretty damn shocked. Yeah, she remembers Victoria mentioning payment being today but it...it was still surprising. She wonders why it doesn't feel like pleasant surprise. "What? It's all there, feel free to count it. I'll give you the other thousand next month."

"Oh." Was all she could think to say. She stuffed the bills in her bag, not really knowing how she was supposed to act. This felt strangely like prostitution. In some ways, it was. 

Victoria doesn't ask Max to put her stuff back in her bag, preferring to just do it herself. "Are we going to continue formulating facts about our fictional fucking, or what?"

"Nice alliteration. But sure." Max glances at her clock. "We better hurry; we have about fifteen minutes."

"Time sure flies when you're with the one you love." Victoria smirks at her.

"Lets just get to the thing, Jesus Christ." Max says to hopefully distract from the reddening of her cheeks. 

"Anything for you, sugartits." 

"I fucking hate you."

"Statistics show that hate is the closest feeling to immense attraction."

"Really?"

"No."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> funfact: I headcanon Max as gay as hell, but i rly wanted to make that bisexual joke :'D
> 
> I remember being like 12 and hanging out with friends during recess and we were trying to come up with names for our group or squad or whatever and I blurted out "bISEXUAL...BITCHES?" and they all looked at me like id just suggested pissing in the teachers coffee or something. I live in the deep south too so :'D i just wanted a name with alliteration tbh
> 
> Funfact: Im apparently psychic because i turned out to actually be bisexual. How 'bout that.


	9. In Which A Pickup Line Is Made

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I CANT BELIEVE THIS FIC HIT 300 KUDOS IM FUCKING FJRLKJKLEJKFLE
> 
> SOMEONE HELP ME I GOTTA PLAN A PARTY HOLY FUCK
> 
> but seriously im so happy!!!! im always terrified of negative feedback when i post a new chap but 3 0 0 kudos lets me know i gotta be doin something right and everyones always so nice and aaaaAAA
> 
> thank yall so much!!!
> 
> EDIT: for some reason this chap was posted as the first chapter and that was weird but i finally fixed it sorry!!

"-And that's all we need to really talk about, right?" Victoria asks, after they've covered as much information as possible in not even a quarter-hour. They finished a lot earlier than they thought they would, so they went ahead and learned the necessary things about each other just in case anyone asked. Most likely, no one would ask, but still. You could never be too safe.

They'd started out with the basics. _Favorite color?_ Max's was blue, and Victoria voiced how predictable she was. Victoria's was violet, to which Max asked why she didn't just call it purple, and she'd never seen Victoria look so offended. Max wondered how Victoria called _her_ the pretentious one. _Favorite food? _Max's was pancakes; Victoria's was something French that Max couldn't even begin to pronounce. It went on for about five minutes until time was really almost up.__

__"Yep." Max replied, moving to grab her bag._ _

__"The one thing I really learned was how utterly bland you are." Victoria said like the peach she was._ _

__"Thanks." She stood up, and set her bag around her shoulders, raising her arms in a stretch. "I learned how much of a secret hipser you are. I mean, Violet as a favorite color? Really? And I'm not even going to mention your favorite quote-"_ _

__"Oh, go sit on a rusty nail." Victoria interrupted, her face red. She got up too, grabbing her bag a bit too roughly to be not salty._ _

__"You're already enough of a pain in the ass." Max mumbled, too quiet for Victoria to hear, because she was as passive-aggressive as they come. She walked to the door and opened it, motioning for Victoria to come the hell on already. She obeyed, which was nice, but she somehow did it snootily without saying anything, which wasn't nice. Max closed the door behind her, and walked with Victoria to their next period. Max was sure they didn't share this class, and it was relieving. She might get hounded with questions by other students, but at least now she wouldn't have a scowling Victoria attached to her._ _

__"What class do you have next?" Max asked._ _

__"German. Why?"_ _

__"Wait, you speak German too?" Eyebrows raised, Max couldn't help but be impressed. Being bilingual was awesome already, but trilingual? Color her impressed. Or violet, if you're like Victoria._ _

__"Nur ein bisschen." Victoria replied, and Max blinked. Okay, she may have absolutely no clue what that meant, but...it kind of sounded...really...aesthetically pleasing to the ears coming from Victoria. She refused to think it sounds hot, but boy was it sure...something. "I've only been learning for a few months, so my vocabulary is pretty basic."_ _

__They continued walking leisurely. After a minute of hesitation, Max blurted, "Can you say something else in German? It just sounds really cool." Cool might not've been the word she was thinking, but it was close enough._ _

__Victoria raised a curious eyebrow, but didn't pressure her for a more truthful reason. "Alright." Then, she stopped walking without warning and wrapped an arm around Max's waist, leaning in and whispering, "Du siehst schön aus."  
Max's face reddened rapidly as she was torn between leaning against Victoria or moving as far away as possible. Victoria didn't lean back or remove her arm. The look she was giving Max made her stomach flutter. Or it could be overwhelming nausea, who knows. _ _

__"Uh..." Max fumbled for a response. "That sounds more than slightly NSFW, and I'd like to remind you that we're in public." Immediately after saying it, she wanted to slap herself. Really, Max, now was the time you decide to be a snarky little shit?_ _

__Victoria wrinkled her nose and backed out of Max's personal space, muttering, "Why do I even try..." Max was kind of confused by that, but didn't bother asking. They continued walking. When they'd almost reached the classrooms building, students started flooding out, probably to skip the next class or take advantage of their free period. Victoria's hand immediately sought hers and Max didn't even flinch away, already pretty used to the sudden feeling of a warm hand gripping hers. Not many people stared; they could be getting used to it or maybe they were just too preoccupied with getting some relaxation away from school for an hour._ _

__"What class do you have?" Victoria asked, leaning towards Max ever-so-slightly, her voice low. They weren't really talking about anything private, but Max sure wasn't complaining. She was a healthy, bisexual teenager, alright? Having a very pretty girl close to her face really wasn't something to fuss about in Max's opinion._ _

__"English." Max answered, voice showing just how spaced-out she was. She could see all the flecks of brown and gold in Victoria's eyes, and maybe she was as much of a hipster as Victoria pegged her to be, because god _damn_ she could write hundreds of shitty poems about how pretty her eyes were._ _

__"Ah." Was all Victoria replied with._ _

__Once they finally made it in the door, Max waited for Victoria to tell her goodbye and do all the fake lovey-dovey shit like she'd done before. Hopefully Max wouldn't get another lipstick print on herself. Those things were hard to wash off._ _

__Victoria didn't say anything at first, and Max raised an eyebrow. The blonde almost looked...contemplative? Max didn't really have time for this though, and neither did Victoria. Class was going to start any time now._ _

__"Well, uh." Max bit her lip. "I guess I'll see you later."_ _

__She turned around to walk to her class, but Victoria stopped her by blurting out, "Wait, you have something on your ass."_ _

__"What?!" Max's face flushed. Did she get candy stuck on her jeans or something? Oh god. "What is it?"_ _

__"My eyes."_ _

__Max stared at her, face blank and mouth slightly open. Victoria was biting her lip like she was trying not to laugh, and that's when Max lost it. She snorted, and it sounded gross but fuck if she could help it, and then laughed so hard it echoed in the almost-empty hallway._ _

__"O-oh my god-" Was all she got out before a hand grabbed her shoulder. Max barely had time to register Victoria leaning in before she felt something touch her teeth and the very edge of her lip. Victoria backed away with the most flustered look Max has ever seen on anybody, and Max almost asked why. Then it finally hit her poor, terribly slow brain._ _

__Victoria had just tried to kiss her. Max had still been in the middle of laughing, so her mouth was open. Victoria had kissed her _teeth_. Oh my god. Max's eyes widened rapidly and her face got hotter by the second. Vaguely, she wondered if there was lipstick on her teeth now._ _

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i feel like something special needed to happen in this but i got nothin lmao so a kISS. or an almost kiss. its the best i could do aight theyre gonna kiss soon i promise.
> 
> TRANSLATIONS:
> 
>  _Nur ein bisschen_ : Just a little
> 
>  _Du siehst schön aus_ : You are beautiful/You look beautiful
> 
>  
> 
> now i did have to use the internet for those lmao so if any native german speakers or just anyone who knows a lick of german (because i sure dont) sees any mistakes then please tell me ;u; (EDIT: a lovely person corrected my mistake in the first translation! thank you!)


	10. In Which Max Hates Everything

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> pro tip: dont listen to jazzy music with a great chorus while writing because you wont be able to resist dancing :D
> 
> but yeah i updated a day later because 8tracks is being an asscrack and wont let me make a playlist so i figured id write :')

Victoria looked terrified; Max's eyebrows were somewhere in her hairline by now, with how much she was raising them. 

"Did...did you..." She was attempting to ask, hand going up to her mouth like it'd confirm that what just happened was real. 

"I didn't do anything." The stilted, cold way it was said would be more effective if Victoria wasn't blushing from the tips of her ears, all the way to the end of her throat. 

"I didn't just imagine you attempting to kiss me!"

"What a stupid thing to assume."

"I probably have lipstick on my teeth to prove it-"

"So what if I did?" Victoria finally said, way too loudly. Max flinched, looking around the empty hallway to make sure no one was seeing this. Day 1, and the power couple were already fighting. That was one rumor Victoria probably didn't want circulating around. "I was...I was playing it up, okay?" She said it a lot more quietly than before, probably so nosy teachers/students wouldn't eavesdrop. 

"There's no one even-" Max started and then gave up, sighing softly. "Look, can we please just talk about this somewhere else?"

"There's nothing to talk about." Victoria replied stonily. "I tried to kiss you to play it up a little, I failed and I kissed your teeth. Nothing more." Max gritted her teeth and stalked forward, then leaned in close to Victoria.

"There was almost no one in this hallway when you tried to kiss me. You wanted to kiss me. Admit. _It._ " Why did she want to hear Victoria say she wanted to kiss her? Max didn't know, but she really, really did. Class has probably already started. Max really doesn't care.

"You're being ridiculous!" Victoria whisper-yelled, flush spreading down to her collar. "Class is starting and we're both going to get punished if we're caught!"

"Too bad. Tell me the truth and we'll go to class."

"That is the truth!"

"If you don't tell me right now, the deal's off."

"You're bluffing!"

"Maybe I am, but still!"

"You're impossible," Victoria groaned.

"Yeah? Well, you're--" Max was gonna say something worse, but was interrupted by a realization. "...Oh my god."

"What?" Victoria snapped. "You wanna verbally assault me some more? By all means, go ahead."

" _Verbally assault?!_ That's not even- no. I'm not even gonna go there." Max made a vaguely pained sound and massaged her temple to hopefully eliminate the headache building. "I was gonna say, we're acting like some kind of middle-aged, heterosexual married couple or something." Victoria's annoyed look evaporated. 

"Holy fuck. We are, aren't we?" Victoria said, and to Max's complete shock, _laughed_. The butterflies made their unwelcome appearance again as Max stared up at Victoria in awe. Then of course it had to be ruined.

"Hey! What are you kids doing?" A voice called, and Victoria's laughter came to a grinding halt and Max froze, looking over at the teacher who'd caught them with a sheepish look.

"Nothing, ma'am! Sorry, we were just going to class-" Max apologized, nudging Victoria in the direction of her designated classroom and walking quickly to hers.

The teacher sighed. "Since you're normally a good student, I'll let this slide, Maxine. Don't do it again." She went back to her classroom. 

"Oh, thank god." Max muttered. She turned around to say goodbye to Victoria, but all she found was a deserted hallway. Someone must've been eager to get to speak more hot-sounding German. 

The brunette walking quietly into English, ignoring the curious stares of students. Sitting down at her desk, Max tried her best to pay attention. The resolve lasted about five minutes. Now completely spaced out with her chin propped up on her hand, Max let her mind wander. Pancakes, Victoria, various music artists, Victoria, a certain old best friend she really needed to get back in touch with, Victoria, planning to ask Kate to be in one of her more professional photographs, _Victoria_...

Pretty soon, the only thing on Max's mind was Victoria, and she hated it.

She was like a lovestruck puppy! Or no, more like a whipped bitch. She's only talked to Victoria for a few days, and it was all for profit on her part and popularity on Victoria's, so why did she...

Ugh.

Her brain got onto the topic of the kiss. The attempted kiss. The attempted teeth kiss. Victoria still didn't admit that she'd _wanted_ to kiss Max, and it annoyed her a fuckton for reasons she couldn't place. She'd get her next time. 

Max was never a patient person. And that's why she had her phone out, no more than a minute later.

[Me @10:13AM: admit itttt]

A reply came in no time, and Max smiled down at her phone. Then she realized it'd look like she was grinning at her crotch if anyone happened to glance at her and stopped.

[Victoria @10:14AM: i admit nothing. why are u so damn hung up on this?]

[Me @10:16AM: u literally tried to take my first kiss and wont admit it. anyone would be pissed!]

[Victoria @10:18AM: and u call me dramatic...]

[Victoria @10:18AM: wait]

[Victoria @10:18AM: ur 18 and you havent even kissed anyone]

[Victoria @10:19AM: oh my god im dating a virgin in every sense of the word]

[Victoria @10:19AM: this is such an honor id like to thank my mom, my cat, my old goldfish that tragically passed over ten years ago, my dad's twelve cars, my left elbow,]

Max bit her lip, trying to keep in the laughter. While Victoria was being an asshole like usual, it was more...lighthearted. And even funny. Who knew she had such a sense of humor?

[Me @10:22AM: alright alright! jesus, you sure like to ramble. can we please get off the topic? im gonna get caught at this rate.]

[Victoria @10:23AM: whatever. but you might wanna ask for a bathroom pass...]

Eyebrows scrunched, Max typed out a reply.

[Me @10:25AM: huh? why?]

[Victoria @10:27AM: because there was definitely some lipstick on ur teeth]

Oh for fucks' _sake_.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> not much happened in this chap at all but fillers are cool too 
> 
> ...
> 
> ;u; i rly wanna make em smooch but like...its so soon!! and i n e e d my slow burn (by slow burn i mean like...theyre probs gonna kiss in a few chaps thats the longest i can wait) so sadly no real kisses yet. awkward teeth kisses are still kisses damn it
> 
> (also this is completely unrelated but...dyou ever just stare at a word for too long and it starts looking hella weird and not even like a word? i do that a lot when i space out and it p a i n s me)


	11. In Which Victoria Is Smooth AF

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ive tried to write this for a few days now but inspiration just wasnt there and ;n; but at least it took me less than a week yeeeee

After having to sheepishly ask the teacher if she could go to the bathroom and insisting that she just really needed to go and no, it really couldn't wait, Max spent five minutes getting lipstick off her teeth with wet paper towels and awkwardly waving and avoiding the eyes of anyone who walked in the bathroom and stared, probably wondering what the fuck she was doing.

When she got back to class, the teacher had moved on to something she had absolutely no clue how to do, so she doodled on her notes like the disappointment she was. Kate's bunny was drawn, because bunnies were something easy and calming to sketch. She absentmindedly drew hair next, roughly filling in strands of what was to be a short haircut, maybe even a pixie style. When it was finished, she added a head, then two eyes that looked sly. It was only when she sketched thin lips set in a smirk that Max realized she drew Victoria.

She shaded the entire thing just because it pained her to leave it unfinished. Bubbly letters of Victoria's name were drawn as an afterthought.

Then Max realized how this could easily be compared to some cliche trope in a chickflick where the unpopular girl stares dreamily at the annoyingly oblivious boy and draws him surrounded by hearts in her notebook. Max scribbled over Victoria's face so hard that the point of her pencil broke and attempted to focus on the lesson. She failed rather quickly.

Thankfully, class went by fast. The bell rung, shaking her out of her stupor, so Max got up and lazily packed up her things. Ugh, it seemed like today was going so slowly. At least it was time for lunch, so Max had about forty minutes to laze about and eat all the unhealthy food she stashed in her bag.

She walked down the hallway, trying not to grimace at the sweaty jocks that'd just come from who-knows-where and sported an impressive amount of B.O.

She was almost outside when she remembered that she had a girlfriend she probably should eat with. That's what couples do, right? Or do they? Shit, she should've asked Victoria back when they were in Max's room.

She yelped when a hand grabbed her arm.

"Wha-"

"Oh, calm down. It's just me." Victoria scoffed, letting go of Max's poor arm. Max made a show of rubbing where Victoria grabbed with a hurt look on her face, and Victoria rolled her eyes.

"Don't go around grabbing people's arms with those steel claws of yours, geez."

"It was practically a loving embrace, so shut the hell up." Victoria sniffed. 

"Boy, do I feel the love." Max retorted dryly. "So, we're eating together aren't we?"

"Well, obviously. Are we eating outside, or....?"

"Definitely outside. It's really nice today, plus there'll be a lot of people to gawk at us, and that's just the greatest."

"If it wasn't so endearing, I'd tell you to cut it out with the sarcasm." Victoria said casually, and Max almost stopped walking when it registered that Victoria called her _endearing_. Casually so, like it was a normal thing to say!

"Yeah, well..." She lamely attempted to reply and gave up, face heating up. Victoria's smile was coy, and her expression was awfully similar to Max's drawing. Once the two of them made it outside, Max asked, "So, where do we eat?"

"How about that candlelit table over there?" Victoria said, voice dripping with sarcasm. "I assumed we'd be eating on the ground." There weren't many options, Max'll give her that. The few cement tables were filled already. Max looked around for a minute, and spotted a place that could actually be just as good.

"What about under that tree?" Max pointed. "We'll have shade at least, and something to lean on."

Victoria surprisingly didn't protest, so they both sat underneath the tree. Max pulled her bag into her lap and pulled out a bag of potato chips. Ah, time to make her body hate her a little more.

"Is that all you brought?" Victoria asked suddenly, staring at the bag of chips in Max's hand like it was the bane of her existence. 

"I brought a candy-bar too..."

Victoria's stare was deadpan. Max shrugged. The blonde began fishing through her bag, and Max moved to open her chips. She almost dropped the bag when an apple was shoved in her hand.

"What's this for?" Max asked. The apple was clearly part of the kind that you bought individually at the grocery store, nearly bigger than Max's hand and a deep red color. Max had to admit that it looked pretty good.

"For eating." Victoria answered, delicately setting her own apple in her lap like it was a five-star meal and not a goddamn fruit.

Max sighed, "I meant, why did you give it to me?"

"Because you can't just eat chips and chocolate for lunch."

"The candy-bar isn't even chocolate..." Max grumbled, biting into the apple anyway. It was just as good as it looked, soft on the inside and sickly sweet in the best way. She took another huge bite, then another. Pretty soon, all that was left was a core. Victoria wasn't even halfway done with hers.

"Wait, why'd you bring two apples?" Max asked. "Can you secretly see the future or something?"

"Of course! I can see the future, and you are obviously a time-traveler. Match made in heaven, right?"

"The sarcasm isn't needed, thanks."

"Well, truthfully..." Victoria's tone changed, and Max raised an eyebrow when she hesitated. "I knew to bring it because...you're... _the apple of my eye._ "

...

"Oh my god, that's the worst pun I've ever heard."

"That laugh says otherwise, Caulfield."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> yeh this was probably my least fav chapter?? aaa i feel like i basically just pulled it out of my ass and ill probably go back and rewrite most of it ;u;


	12. In Which Gay Porn is Spank Bank Material According to Victoria

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ok....ok. ok ok...
> 
> I was trying to finish the second chap of some kinky marshfield but i glanced at this fic and oh my fucking GOD!!!! 4 0 0 KUDOS......
> 
> IT FEELS LIKE IT JUST HIT 300 AND IM FUCKIN SCREAMING. HOW DO I EVEN THANK PPL ENOUGH?? I NEED TO HUG 400 PEOPLE SO I CAN SHOW HOW GRATEFUL I AM HOLY FUCK.
> 
> but seriously I'm so happy!!! Tbh I kinda...I'm not too confident w/ writing and always think i could've done something better after i post a chapter so this is just....*screams*. And recently I checked my statistic thingy and ive written 50,000 words from september to now? idk if that's impressive (prolly not considering all the amazing-ass fics ive seen that are 1 0 0 K WORDS) but im kinda proud and
> 
> thank yall so much!! Everyone's always so nice in the comments too and aaaaaaaa. i just had to write another chap even tho its only been 3 days since the last one and its like 3am but idc

"So...wait, did you bring two apples today just so you could say that godawful pun? Because I have trouble believing you just happen to bring two apples everyday." Max asked five minutes later, still unable to get over the atrocity that was Victoria's sense of humor. 

Okay, sometimes she could be funny. But not now. Oh, god, not now.

"Maybe." Victoria, finally finished with her own apple and stood up, holding a hand out. "Give me your apple core." Max did so, inwardly cringing at how sticky her hands were now. Damn apples and their delicious, albeit extremely sticky juice. Victoria walked over to a garbage bin and threw both the cores away and walked back, plopping down once more. The blonde was a little closer than she'd been before, Max noticed.

If she wanted, she could casually take Victoria's hand. Except she couldn't, because her hands are sticky as hell and looked kind of weird next to Victoria's. While Miss Popularity was sporting perfect pianist hands with an impeccible manicure, Max practically had baseball mitts. Baseball mitts that had uneven nails from her biting them as a nervous habit. Max could now say she's felt self-conscious of her hands. Great.

"Are you jealous of my manicure or something?" Victoria spoke suddenly, and Max tore her gaze from Victoria's hand, realizing how weird she must've looked. Staring dreamily at Victoria's hands wasn't what she'd planned on doing today. 

"I was just thinking about something and spaced out." Max tried to play it cool.

"Was it porn? With the way you were staring, I wouldn't be surprised."

"Oh, of course. It was the best porn." Max said, straight-faced. 

"I bet it was the shit that has pop music playing in the background as some semi-attractive twinky hipster uses his hair-straightener as a dildo."

Max tried to speak, but no words came. She tried again. "...I...never want to see your porn history if it has stuff like that, holy shit."

"I get bored." Victoria shrugs. "You look like the type that would favor camshows more than actual porn. Probably gay porn too."

"Okay, first of all, I've never watched a camshow in my entire life. Second, hasn't everyone watched gay porn at least once or twice? The visuals of two guys going at it doesn't exactly tickle my pickle, but-"

"I can't believe I'm dating a homophobe." Victoria looked convincingly displeased. "How dare you not diddle your skittle to two sweaty men buttfucking?! The outrage." She'd said it pretty loudly, and several heads turned in their direction. 

Max snorted, covering her mouth to keep in any laughing. Victoria was an ass, but...she could definitely be funny. Well, two could play at that game.

"I'm sorry, I just..." Max puts on her best apologetic expression. "The penis...it frightens me. I have a serious fear of penises. It haunts me every single day. I can't go to sleep without checking underneath my bed and in my closet for any lurking dongs. The phrase 'rock out with your cock out' makes me physically sick."

A beat of silence. 

Victoria covers her face. Her shoulders are shaking with laughter and Max feels unbearably smug. 

"My phobia isn't something to laugh at, Victoria."

"S-shut up, oh my god, I'm gonna piss myself." Victoria says inbetween bouts of laughter. Her laugh is not what Max thought it'd be before she'd heard it. Victoria snorted a lot. It was endearingly cute, Max had to admit. 

"I'd rather you didn't pee in the courtyard, thanks. Save that for the bedroom." Max waggled her eyebrows.

"So _that's_ what you're into."

"Shut up." Max pushed her shoulder playfully. 

"As you wish, Mistress Maxine." Victoria smirks as Max balks at the title she'd just been bestowed. No, she wasn't letting Victoria get the last word in this unusual, slightly kinky battle of wit. 

"You do aim to please, don't you," Max paused for dramatic affect. " _Tori?_ " The nickname was practically dripping with innuendo. She expected an unimpressed snort or some other deadpan reaction.

What she got was Victoria flushing to the tips of her ears.

Max raised an eyebrow when Victoria didn't say anything. "Uh? Did I break you or something?"

"Fuck off." Victoria sneered, face still adorably tomato-colored. "I just didn't expect the stupid nickname."

"Tori's a great nickname. In fact, I'm gonna call you Tori from now on."

"I will murder you."

"Your kind words really do make me weak in the knees, babe."

Max looked up and noticed that most of the students had gone inside. Lunch was over already. And she didn't even get to eat her candy, damn it. She stood and brushed off her jeans.

"See you later, I guess." Max said like the true romantic she was. 

"Whatever." Victoria was basically pouting at this point, and Max found it a little cute and a lot hilarious.

"Oh, don't be grouchy. In fact," Max paused to dig through her bag. She pulled out her candybar. "Have this."

"Like I'd want your calorie-filled-" She cut herself off when Max leaned in and hugged her. "Um...?"

Before she could pull away and snark at her more, Max stuck the candybar in Victoria's back pocket, masking a grin at her undignified squeak. Max pulled away, and before the nerve left her, kissed Victoria on the cheek.

"Bye!" Max booked it to class as fast as she could in case Victoria was mad enough to try and chase her.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> dont even ask me what the fuck was goin on in this chap because i dont know either. this is like a mixture of my tiredness and how damn happy i am rn. so just gay porn and penis fear. nice.
> 
> (on a completely unrelated note is anyone watching drag race season 8? Im hella loving it so far!!! Bob the drag queen is just as good as i thought she'd be and chi chi is hnnng. kim chi is like my literal weeb fantasy too- ok sorry ill stop. This has nothing to do with this fic or life is strange but i dont have anyone to freak out about drag race with ;u;)
> 
> (also victoria was wearing jeans or smth in this chap ok im aware that skirts dont have back pockets)


	13. In Which Victoria Has Some Choice Ass

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> aw jeez this took a little longer than i wanted it to 
> 
> sorry about that :') ive been feeling pretty under the weather but these gay dorks heal all ok
> 
> also i did some victoria pov!!!!! wowee. she was surprisingly...easier to write than Max. yeah its much easier to write a bitchy tsundere than an awkward dork :D

Surprisingly, Max learned something from what she'd just done. She was really fucking out of shape.

Max needed to start working out or at least take a casual jog now and then, because she was wheezing by the time she made it to her next period.

Running sucked. If Max ever ended up being chased by a serial killer with a chainsaw, she'd probably just lay down and accept her fate after a good 12 seconds of half-hearted sprinting. Exercise needed to quit being so tedious and difficult, honestly. If you asked anyone (besides maybe some overzealous body-builder or something) if they'd like to exercise or eat an entire can of pringles in one sitting, they'd all definitely go for the second option. That was just common sense.

....She was mentally rambling about stupid things again, great. Max had a habit of getting lost in her own weird thoughts when she was nervous about something.

She shouldn't have done that. The playful groping and candybar thing was already pretty flirtatious, and then she just _had_ to kiss her cheek, didn't she? How Max went from awkward to flirty in no time was beyond her. She wasn't like that with anyone else; awkward, sure, but flirtatious? Never. Why did being around Victoria turn her into some wannabe ladykiller? It really was baffling.

Max sighed for the eighth time since she'd made it to class, drumming her fingers on her desk. Next time she sees Victoria, its most likely gonna be ten different types of uncomfortable. She can't say it's anyone's fault but her own.

...Victoria's ass did feel as nice as it looked though.

Max laid her head down on her desk.

 

\--

"Do you need to go to the nurse, Ms. Chase?" A concern teacher asked Victoria. "Your face has been flushed since you came to class."

"I'm fine, Ma'am." Victoria scowled inwardly, but on the outside, her smile was sugary sweet. "It's just the heat outside."

"If you're positive." The teacher frowned, obviously not convinced. Victoria couldn't bring herself to give a fuck. Let them believe what they want. She really wasn't sick, just...

It was all Caulfield's fault. When was she _not_ to blame for all the problems in Victoria's life? 

Never, that's when. 

Victoria had been so dazed from the _groping_ and cheek kiss that she forgot to take the cheap, unhealthy candybar out of her pocket. In short, she ended up sitting down at her desk and feeling something _squish_. Max better fucking pray none of the melted disaster got on her jeans.

What business did she have doing that shit to Victoria in the first place? She's the one always reminding Victoria how fake this is, and then she practically fondles her ass and then kisses her cheek! What kind of message was she trying to send? Was Victoria being dumb and reading too much into it? As much as she didn't want to admit it, it was likely. Victoria was turning a joke into something else, something she kind of wanted.

God, she was pathetic. At least Max was worse than she was.

It was only when she noticed the annoyed stares of a few students that Victoria registered she was clicking her pen over and over out of nerves. Victoria kindly flipped them off.

Why did she pick the little dweeb out of every other popular fucker at this school again?

Oh yeah, because Victoria was a fucking idiot and thought she could kill two birds with one stone by using Max to get popularity and also, maybe, get Max to...like her. Not even romantically, just...on some kind of friendship level. But then Victoria just had to go and catch some semblance of an actual romantic liking to the hipster and ruin everything. What was there to even like about Max? She was fucking pretentious as shit, had a terrible taste in fashion, idolized the most horrible bands, is a hipster in every sense of the word...

But Max was also funny. Her sense of humor was weird, and in the best way. She wasn't arrogant about her ranking in the school. When she laughed, her nose scrunched up and she snorted a lot and while it shouldn't be endearing, it really was. And...she had a really nice face. Cute nose, high cheekbones, bitten lips that were somehow still tempting, and the prettiest eyes Victoria's probably ever seen. Victoria wasn't the poetic type, but she could honestly do some good old slam poetry, entirely based on Max's eyes.

And also her ass. Because that was very nice too.

Victoria wasn't a romantic and never would be, but she'd go on as many terribly sappy dates as Max wanted, if Max actually ever wanted to date her. But that would never happen. Maybe in some far-off dream world where everything was lollipops and gumdrops, but not here. 

The reality of it was she was paying Max on the slim chance she might get popular, and the only reason Max was even talking to her is because she was paying her to. No one was innocent in this, and Max only acknowledged her existence is because Victoria was giving her literal thousands of dollars.

This was closer to fucking prostitution than romance.

Victoria's hands balled into fists beneath the desk.

And that is all it's ever going to be.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> lmao this is about as angsty as this storys gon get and this wasnt even angst, just vic being dumb and refusing to quit being a pessimist
> 
> electroswing is my new fav music genre and i listened to an entire playlist of it while writing this gay filth ;) sadly its not erotic gay filth
> 
> they should probs have a real kiss before they get to banging.
> 
> yeah.


	14. In Which They fUCKING KISS HOLY FUCK IT ONLY TOOK 14K WORDS

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hnng it doesnt feel like a whole nine/ten days since i updated but i guess it is :') i havent been feeling the best lately tbh. moodswings are going berserk and ive gotta do something early tomorrow that im dreading and its...4 am 
> 
> wow im fucked.
> 
> BUT!!! THE GAY WILL PREVAIL!!!!!!!!!!!! SO HERE IT IS LOOK AT HOW GAY IT IS

The rest of the day passed surprisingly fast. Subjectively, that was a good thing, since school sucks all the ass that ever existed, but one thing was kind of putting a damper on Max's mood.

Victoria. 

No, not Victoria herself. 

More like Victoria's mood. Because jesus almighty, since lunch when Max may have flirted a _tiny_ bit, the blonde has been...well, fucking awkward as hell to be around, to put it bluntly. Joking glares and exaggerated complaints that Max had become accostumed to had turned into silence and avoided eye contact. Max tried to joke around to get Victoria to perk up a bit, but nothing had worked. Not even her terrible puns that she'd been saving for this kind of occasion. Damn shame, really. 

It had to be Max's fault. What else could it be? Unless that delicious apple had set off Victoria somehow, but she sincerely doubted it. Those apples were the bomb.

Victoria acting like this made her realize how, kind of, fun it'd been before. Awkward at times, sure. Frustrating? Absolutely. Humiliating? Of course. But...it was fun. Joking with someone, holding their hand, getting to know them, it was a really nice feeling. Even with that little part of her mind that just loved to remind her that Victoria was basically using her for popularity.

Then again, Max was doing the same, just with a different goal in hand. Financial gain. Both sides were shallow and kind of terrible and Max didn't like thinking about it or the wad of money stashed guiltily in her bag.

Max wanted that part of her mind to kindly shut the fuck up and let her try to be an optimist for once.

She decided that she'll mention it after the bell rings. This was her last class, and Victoria still walked with her everywhere, even with her sour mood and the ridiculous amount of awkwardness. 

The bell rung way too soon, and Max wasn't at all ready. What did she even say? That she didn't mean for it to be so flirtatious? A lie if she's ever heard one. Maybe that it was just a joke? No, no. Max would just be a grade-a douchebag if she said something dumb like that. She should just try to talk it out with the blonde. _Try_. She honestly doubted that it would go anywhere, since Victoria was stubborn as fuck, but Max could still hope.

Max got up and hauled her bag along with her. She waited silently by the door for Victoria, an unusually nervous look on her face. Her expression briefly brightened when her (fake) girlfriend walked over, only to fall when she noticed Victoria's irritated look.

"Come on." The Popularity Princess muttered, grabbing Max's hand before she could get a word out and dragging her down the hallway, then outside to the dorms. Max stole nervous glances over at her, and found her staring straight ahead. 

They were at Max's door way too soon. Victoria let go of her hand, and Max opened her mouth to ask if they could possibly talk in private. In the middle of her first word, Victoria turned around and walked promptly to her room. She slammed the door. All the girls that were standing in the hallway stared with wide eyes.

Max felt a headache coming on.

It took her a good thirty minutes of trying to motivate and give herself embarrassing pep talks before she got the courage to walk over to Victoria's door and knock.

Knock. Knock. And finally, knock. What a thrilling conclusion. Three knocks was just the right amount, wasn't it? Two was way too relaxed and four would just make her seem desperate.

The door cracked open, just barely. Max could see Victoria's eyes, unsurprisingly set in a glare, and nose. That was about it. When she saw it was Max, she didn't open it any further and her glare didn't lessen.

"What?"

"...Um." Max fumbled, suddenly forgetting everything she'd been wanting to say.Victoria narrowed her eyes and moved to shut the door.

Without thinking, Max put her foot inbetween it so the door couldn't be shut, wincing slightly when Victoria tried to slam it anyway. Thank god she was wearing fairly tough shoes.

"Well, ow."

"Move your foot or I'll do it again." Victoria said. For the first time that day, Max was kind of hurt by something she said. Literally and figuratively.

"Please don't." Max begged quietly, ignoring the nosy stares of over half the dorm's inhabitants. Girls could be some nosey bitches. "Look, I need to talk to you. In private."

"We can talk here." Victoria opened the door wider and leaned against it, casual and mocking. Max didn't like it.

"It's....it's about something personal, and I'd really rather we talk about it in my room or-"

"No. Here or nowhere. I don't want to come in your room or have you in mine." Wow, that stung. What the fuck was _wrong_ with her? Not only was she acting like a bitch in every definition of the word, but she was doing it in front of people! Did she just forget about the whole point of this entire deal? People aren't gonna like her if they see her like this, didn't she know that?

"Please, just listen, okay?" Max tried again.

"I'm counting to three." 

"But-"

"One."

"If you'll just wait-"

"Two."

Max felt a hot flash of annoyance. It mingled with her embarrassment, and in the end, just made her pissed at Victoria. Not taking time to really think about what she was doing, Max shoved her way in Victoria's room, elbowing her in the side sort-of-accidentally in the process.

"What the fuck is wrong with you?" Victoria thankfully shut the door so maybe only _half_ the hallway could here them now.

"I should be asking you the same thing!" Max fired back.

"You can't just barge into my room, Caulfield!" With every word, Victoria was getting closer and closer, eyes mean and mouth in a snarl.

"I'm your girlfriend, so yes, I can." Max glared up at the blonde, trying not to show how intimidated she actually was. Victoria was a little scary when she was this angry.

"More like my fucking escort." Victoria attempted to insult her. She suddenly looked more sad than angry, expression dangerously close to almost-crying levels of sad. Max stared, both baffled and exasperated. What the fuck were these moodswings Victoria was having?

"Why...Why are you acting like this? What did I do, Victoria? Is it because of what happened at lunch? Look, I'm sorry if I weirded you out, but please don't act like this."

"It isn't because of that."

"It isn't?"

"Well, it is, but....Fuck. It didn't weird me out."

"Then what the hell's the matter?" Her voice was high and she hoped it showed how absolutely done she was.

"A lot is!" Victoria blurted out.

"...What?"

"Shit, I don't know, alright? There's just...fuck. Nevermind. It's nothing."

"It's a lot of something, Tori. Tell me, please." The nickname slipped out without hesitation. Victoria's face colored, but her stony expressions stayed firmly in place.

"There's nothing to tell."

"There is."

"Not."

"Real mature, dude." Max sighed. "Tell. Me."

"Nope."

"Please?" She took a step forward. Victoria was so close, Max could reach out and grab her hand if she wanted. Right now wasn't exactly the time though.

"No."

"Pretty please?" She tried again, leaning forward slightly and looking into Victoria's eyes in what she hoped was a persuasive manner.

"Non."

"This is ridiculous!" Max huffed, tilting her head up to glare at the blonde. "Why won't you tell me? What can be that bad?"

"...You really wanna know." It was said more like a statement and less of a question.

"Obviously!"

"Well, how about I show you instead of telling you?"

Max was going to ask what the hell that meant, but the words got caught in her throat when Victoria stalked forward, closing the meager distance between them. For a split second, Max honestly thought Victoria was going to punch her or something. 

Something even more unexpected happened.

Victoria kissed her.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ....they kissed. yes. yes. ye
> 
> also heyheyheyheyheyeyhey if you wanna know what i usually listen to when i write new chapters 
> 
> its t h i s: http://8tracks.com/handoverthebooty/hey-hey-lets-be-gay-gay
> 
> yes thats my own 8tracks playlist bc im shameless and its a chasefield mix i made in like september so go listen if u wanna


	15. In Which All Is Happy and Gay Once More

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> 5 0 0 kuDOS..........
> 
> someone hELP ME OH MY GOD IM GONNA FAIN T HOW THE FUCK DID THIS DUMB STORY GET NEAR THAT MANY??? FUCK FUCKF FUCKKFFJIERJWKJWEKJFN AAAAAAAAAAA 
> 
> srsly i just...thank all of yall so much!!! i feel like i just started this fic (ok its been like 5-6 months b u t) and ughhh ppl still stick around even after i took a month or so to update and eeeee im so grateful!!! <33333 
> 
>  
> 
> (i also listened to a mixture of vocaloid and arctic monkeys while writing this so thats something.)

Max blinked rapidly, eyebrows to her hairline as she was being smooched by no other than Victoria fucking Chase.

She had instinctively leaned back when Victoria had leaned in, but the blonde had moved to cradle the back of her head with a surprisingly gentle hand, preventing her from falling back and making a fool of herself. Her arms were stiff at her sides. Not from being uncomfortable, because she wasn't, it was more like shock.

Her first kiss was officially taken. She didn't know how to feel about that.

It wasn't much of a kiss, really. Victoria's lips were unmoving against her own, and a quick glance showed that her eyes were clenched shut, like she was expecting to be pushed away any minute or even slapped. 

If, sometime in the future, you asked Max why she'd parted her lips and started responding, she'd shrug and say she didn't want her first kiss to be lame.

The truth was that Max actually, kind of, possibly, maybe wanted to kiss Victoria. Not that she'd ever admit it.

She was as inexperienced as they come, so she didn't have a guess as to what was the right way to do it, but she tried. A slow, gentle brush of her mouth on Victoria's as she relaxed in her embrace. Victoria's lips were soft. She seems the type to wear chapstick religiously, so that's not surprising, but it still made Max a little conscious of how dry her lips probably were. Her hand circled Victoria's waist, stopping to rest on the small of her back. It was maybe a little too close to her ass, but hey. Max wasn't a saint.

Victoria's reaction was immediate. Max could feel a shudder run through the blonde's entire body. Not 10 seconds after Max actually started kissing back, Victoria pushed her away.

"What the _fuck_ ," Victoria swore, eyes wide. 

....Well. That wasn't exactly the reaction she was expecting. Were her kissing skills really that bad? Damn.

"What?"

"Why didn't you push me away?" She demanded. 

"...Come again?"

"You weren't supposed to kiss back!"

"I'm-" Max started, absolutely dumbstruck. "Are you on some kind of drug right now? Is it that time of the month? No, periods don't make people act this confusing, it's gotta be drugs. How many fingers am I holding up?" She held up three fingers. 

"I'm not on drugs, you dumbass." Victoria said, mouth set in a hard line. 

"Then why-" Was the start of Max's exasperated reply.

"Because you're not making this easier for me! I try and try to get over these stupid fucking feelings by distancing myself, and you won't let me. Then I kiss you, and what do you do? kiss back! You're so adamant about this being fake and entirely based of some type of gain, and yet you do this! Are you trying to confuse me? Huh, Is that it? Because it's fucking working! Maybe you like the fact that I'm a pathetic excuse of a person that tries to pay someone to date them for the _slightest_ chance of popularity, and then ends up actually ends up liking that person. That's the saddest thing about all of this." Victoria said, all in one breath. Her voice was hoarse and her eyes glistened by the time she finished. 

Max stood there, eyes wide and mouth slightly open. Victoria had basically just confessed, and called herself pathetic, and...Max had absolutely no clue how to respond. She cleared her throat and prayed this doesn't make it worse, "You're...one hell of a pessimist, aren't you?" 

Victoria's glare hardened and she opened her mouth, probably to yell at her some more, so Max quickly continued, "Before you say anything else, just lemme speak, alright?"

Max took her silence as a yes. 

"So...you kissed me. And I kissed back. That obviously means something. I've never kissed anyone, remember? If I didn't _want_ to kiss you, then I wouldn't. And...yeah, we're doing this because of really fucking shallow reasons, but I don't feel happy about getting the money like I thought I would. And I really thought this would be awful, but it hasn't been. The last few hours have sucked, but that's because you were trying to make them that way. I'm not blaming you, I completely understand why you tried to distance yourself, but...it isn't as bad as you make it out to be. I...I kind of consider you a friend, okay?" Victoria's angry expression was getting less severe by the minute, and she didn't look like she was going to cry any minute like before. A good sign. 

Max inhaled deeply and continued, "Maybe even more. To be honest, I've been having some really confusing thoughts about you too, but I for sure know that I want us to be genuine friends. Would you want that?"

Victoria opened her mouth, then closed it again. Max waited. 

Victoria finally nodded. Max couldn't help but smile.

"Alrighty then. We're friends. Well, friends help each other out, don't they?" Max moved to get her bag, when she realized she left it in her room. "Um. I'll be right back, please don't go anywhere or lock me out."

She walked as fast as she could to her room, grabbed her bag, and walked back to Victoria's room, pointedly ignoring all the stares of pretty much the entire hallway.

"I'm back, sorry about that." Max apologized, unzipping her bag and fishing through it. She hummed when her hand closed around what she needed. "Here."

It was the money Victoria had given her earlier.

"What-"

"It'd be pretty fucked up if a friend wanted thousands of dollars for a simple favor." Max said sheepishly. "Take it. I really don't want it, and I'm still 100% on board with helping you."

"I..." Victoria looked utterly dumbfounded, eyes flickering from Max's outstretched hand that held the money, back to Max's face. "You're...a dumbass, you know that? It should be impossible for a hipster like you to be so nice and forgiving. The nerve."

Face breaking out into a grin, Max replied with, "And it makes no sense for a stuck-up person like you to be so adorable, but you somehow manage."

"Shut up."

"Anything for you, Tori."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i hope that baby angst from the last chap/beginning of this one was gr8 because thats about all this fic is gon have :D
> 
> but also!! ok so 
> 
> i realize i have fics i rllly rly need to update and a few people have asked when tf certain ones are gonna get an update and tbh, I'm hella bad with juggling multiple fics at once. so i'm _probably_ just gonna focus on getting this story a sem-regular update schedule until it's finished and then focus on other fics. but for now, updates for most other fics will probably be sporadic at best. Sorry :') i feel rly bad about it but when i say ill update certain ones and end up getting distracted i feel terrible so i'm just gonna say that rent-a-girlfriend is the only one im focusing on. others will get updated, i'm not giving up on ANY of my fics, but it will take a while for updates. a while could be two weeks or two months, idek man. but yeah, i feel guilty but i'm trying to finish the ones i'm most passionate about first (this fic being top priority) and then go down the line. sorry again. 
> 
> WOW THAT WAS LONG I SURE KNOW HOW TO RAMBLE JFC.
> 
> ok now time to look for food because it's 7am and im s t a r v i n g.


	16. In Which Max's Thirst is Too Strong

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> an update in less than a week woah what is this sorcery o: 
> 
> this is the chap where maxs thirst fully shows 
> 
> g e t r e a d y

"So...can I request something?" Max asks, a few minutes after their...talk? Is that what you call it?

"I'm all ears. Go on." Not even the playful bitchyness she'd seen all day, holy shit, Victoria must really be feeling better. Max is a miracle worker.

"...Want me to stay over? For the night, I mean." 

Victoria's eyes widened. She opened her mouth, but nothing came out. Max bit her lip to hide how hard she was grinning. "...Uh?"

"Is that a yes?"

"I- Um....Why?" Victoria finally gets out a semi-coherent response.

"Because I want to." Max shrugs. "It'll be fun. Please?"

Victoria stared at her, face obviously red even under the dim lighting of her room. Max waits for her response and tries to give her best pleading look.

No less than ten minutes later, Max was seated comfortably and possibly a little smugly on Victoria's bed because she wasn't going anywhere anytime soon. Why did she want to spend the whole night with Victoria? Well, she feels like she deserves it after getting the cold shoulder all day. She still doesn't blame Victoria, not at all, but she wants to see more of the blonde's nicer side. Desperately so. And now she was! She was a miracle worker times two. Fuck yeah.

"I don't even know if this is allowed." Victoria pretended to grumble. Max knew she secretly loved her company. If she didn't want Max to spend the night with her when she asked, Victoria would've said no in a heartbeat. Max is glad she didn't.

"I mean, probably. We're both girls here, right?" Max waggled her eyebrows when she knew the blonde was looking. "Just gals being pals, that's us."

"Ah, yes. Just two girls, both of which happen to be bisexual, hanging out as friends after the most homosexual and heartwarming exchange ever. Totally believable."

"You're bi too?" Max asked curiously, leaning forward slightly from her place at the foot of Victoria's bed. 

"Mm." She hums. "I'm attracted to guys. Not romantically though."

"Whadaya mean?"

"Like, they're cute and can be pretty fun, if you get what I mean by that. I'd just never date one because I'm not interested. Think of it like...having a dildo with added perks and possibly a brain." Victoria says with a straight face. 

Max snorts, trying not to laugh too much at Victoria's mean joke, despite how funny it kind of was. "You're such a jerk, oh my god."

"I'm only joking, hippie. I'm mostly into girls though."

"You gaywad." 

Victoria flips her off. Max blows her a kiss in response.

"Speaking of, I'm going to need to change." Victoria rises from her bed. Max was about to ask what changing clothing had to do with the word gayward, but her words got caught somewhere in her throat when Victoria just casually fucking _started stripping right in front of her_.

Max made a questioning sound that was somewhere between a dying horse and a bike horn. Victoria ignored her, unbuttoning the very last button of her shirt and letting it fall from her shoulders and wow, this was really happening. Victoria's skin was all the same light tone. She must be naturally pale.

Max can see her bra, oh god. It wasn't overtly sexual, no lace or anything like that. Just a pretty light blue color. Nothing to really freak out over. And yet Max honestly felt like she was going to overheat any minute, torn between covering her eyes like a scandalized child and not looking away at all, refusing to miss any of what was being presented.

Max was a confused pervert. Or something. Lord help her.

"Take a picture, why don't you?" Victoria's teasing voice interrupted the dead silence of the room. Max's eyes, which had previously been shamefully trained on Victoria's cleavage and thin stomach, snapped up to her face guiltily. 

"Just admiring your taste in..." Max's brain fumbled for a good response that didn't give away how utterly gross she was just being. "Bras."

Fuck. 

"It's nothing special." The blonde shrugged, and Max's eyes were drawn back down to her chest at the sudden movement. God, she was disgusting. "But your taste in underwear is really boring, so I guess I can see why you like mine." She smirked wickedly at Max, still somehow oblivious to Max's, well, thirst, if you want to put it plainly. 

"Yeah." Max said, only realizing what Victoria had said after she'd already replied.

"Are you feeling okay?" Victoria raised an eyebrow, and then went to unbutton her jeans.

Max wasn't going to survive this.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ;) i hope this was ok? idek honestly it might be terrible but the next chap
> 
> is literally just going to be goofy dorks doing stupid shit and maybe even playing never have i ever or some stupid game like that and getting even gayer so i hope yall are ready!!!!!!


	17. In which it's a little like a cliché heterosexual anime except a lot gayer

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> dangiitttt this took a minute and the chap isnt even what i wanted it to be :''') fuck me man.
> 
> but. some gay stuff goes down. real gay. super gay. mega gay.
> 
> its like 2am and my phone is dead and so am i.
> 
> BUT OH MY GOD I FORGOT TO SAY!! I CNAT FUCKING BELIEVE THIS HIT 6 0 0 KUDOS IM FUCKING SCREAMING!!! THANK Y'ALL SO MUCH??? I JUST?? AAAAAAAAAAA ----

Max eye's were trained on the floor. Because it was really interesting. Max definitely wasn't staring at the wall because there was a half-naked Victoria who was in the process of taking removing the last of her modesty, or in other words, her fucking pants.

Was modesty just something she lacked? Maybe her everlasting confidence extended to physical appearance as well, because most people, unless they were married or dating, didn't just casually strip in front of another person. Which...well, from the kiss and the confession and the deal, Max can say that they're technically dating. Huh.

It still doesn't make this any less weird!

Max's left eye literally _twitched_ when the sound of a zipper being pulled down interrupted the rather awkward silence of the room. 

"I'm right here, ya know." She tried to sound snarky, but it came out almost like a plea. For what, she didn't know. Or didn't want to admit.

"What?" Victoria's voice was light and mocking. "We're both girls here, remember? Gal's being pals, that's totally us."

"Don't mock me." Max grumbled.

"Wouldn't dream of it, babe." Victoria replied, and Max's eyes got comically wide at the nickname. Pet name, more like. 

"Babe?" Max tried to ask without stuttering.

"Mm." Victoria hummed. "It's just a nickname. You give me one too. It's only fair."

"Uh." What she should've done was make up some vaguely insulting name, just to see Victoria glare and act all indignant, but she didn't. Instead, she said the first thing that came to mind. "...What about sugar?"

"...That's really lame, if I'm being honest." 

"Well, fine, then I'll just not call you anything." Max huffed. What was so bad about sugar? It was hell of a lot better, or at least equal to, than babe. Victoria was lucky that Max was kind enough to refer to her as something so sweet. 

"I didn't say I didn't like it, Caulfield, so don't get your boring panties in such a twist. Feel free to call me that."

"Alright, uh, sugar." She tested it out, and it...wasn't bad. Didn't roll off the tongue, but no pet name would, because Max was just awkward like that. 

"Nice." Victoria snickered a bit, but it didn't have any meanness to it. The sound of clothes being removed moved in when the conversation lulled.

"How are you not done changing yet, holy crap." Max said, exasperated. "Do you have three pairs of pants on or something?"

"No, you're just impatient." More rustling sounds. "What's so interesting about the ground, by the way? You seem to be staring awfully hard at it."

Fuck. 

"It's a nice color." Way to go, Max. Very believable.

"I bet." The sounds stopped. "Wait. Are you..."

"No!" Max practically shrieked before Victoria could even finish.

"Liar. Why so shy, Max?" Without looking, Max could almost see the smirk on Victoria's smug face. "It's nothing you haven't seen before."

"It's not because of that!" Max insisted even though she knew she was doomed.

"Oh, really?" The sound of Victoria taking a step forward made her immediately regret denying it. "Well, If you're not shy, then I'm in the mood for a good hug. Right. Now."

"Can I take a rain check?" Max wheezed, and looked up. Accidentally. Mostly accidentally. A good 40% accidentally. 

Victoria wasn't naked. At least, not fully. But her top was still off and her bottom half was only covered by a pair of purple shorts that didn't even reach mid-thigh. Victoria took another step closer, and another. Max's eyes darted from side-to-side, looking for an escape route like Victoria was a lioness and she was a gazelle. Victoria's predatory gaze certainly rivaled that of a lion's.

It didn't take long for Victoria to trap Max into a corner. 

Max would say that it was because Victoria was just really quick and caught her off guard, but the reality of it was that a huge part of her kind of wanted to get caught. You'd have to rip out her entire left nipple with a corkscrew to ever get her to admit it though.

"Hug time." Victoria whispered, breath tickling her face. It smelled like apples, while the rest of her smelled faintly of vanilla. x

As a last ditch effort, Max pushed out with both hands. Not only was it not a hard push, because she wasn't protesting this as much as she should, let's be honest here, but also...

She somehow forgot that Victoria was currently shirtless.

And so, Maxine Caulfiend ended up with two handfuls of Victoria Chase's boobs. 

Mostly her bra, actually, but that didn't change the fact that she was literally groping Victoria. Victoria had stopped trying to hug her, now only staring down at Max's terrible hands, that _were still on her boobs for fuck's sake_ , with a shocked expression.

Max pulled away so fast that you'd think her hands had somehow gotten burned by the tiddy, and frantically tried to back away, not realizing that she was less than a foot away from a wall. Her head hit the unforgiving surface with a dull _thud_ and she slowly slid to the ground with a sound of despair.

It brought her face level with Victoria's crotch, which clearly wasn't any better than before. And now her head hurt.

"Oh my god." She heard Victoria say. 

"Don't- just." Max held her head in her hands. "Please don't talk."

About three seconds of welcoming silence. Then, Victoria was laughing so hard it was somewhere inbetween a wheeze and a guffaw. 

"I hate everthing." Max groaned.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> the accidental boob grab happens in like every straight anime ever (not that i ever watch those) buuuuttt i couldnt help myself ;)
> 
> and!! nicknames!! wowweeee
> 
> i chose those specifically because me and my bestest bro call each other those and im corny and so there.
> 
> (one more thing!!!!!! completely unrelated but- id love some music recs!!! i have way too few songs in my phone, so any song recommendations would be cool!! im cool w/ most everything except metal, and especially love foreign songs and electroswing, but any song is good!! so please rec me some if ya have the time ;u;)


	18. In which feels kinda happen but it's all gay and okay

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> holy shiitt an update (even if its short hhhh) in less than a week!!!!!!!!? look at me go :'D
> 
> im rly rly sorry for taking so long with most of the chaps but ive kinda been working on writing something else that i might not even post ejfejqa. its...uh. very...different. and by different i mean kinky and fucked up and not at all like what i usually put on here so i probably wont post it :D gotta get my sins out somehow y'all.
> 
> but!! this is still main priority so ill def work on getting chapters longer. and also- i put a tentative end on this at chapter 25 but!!! i dunno if i'll end it there or not, i just wanted to feel like i have an endgame somewhere if that makes sense ;u; idek man, lately im feeling like my fic isnt as up to par with the other awesome chasefield fics, u feel?? but eh ill get over it
> 
> NOW ONTO THE GAY

After a good five minutes of Victoria laughing and Max laying on the floor and cradling her aching head, the blonde finally offered a hand to help her up. Max kindly flipped her off without looking up.

"Oh, come on, Max. It isn't my fault your awkwardness is so hilarious." She went back to snickering and Max flipped her off once more with a little added force. "Thanks for the grope by the way. I really feel the romance."

"It's your fault for sexually harrassing me." Max grumbled, finally taking the other girl's hand and getting up.

"I was trying to hug you, not tie you up and spit in your mouth, so calm down."

" _Spit in my_ -" Max shuddered. "You're into some weird shit, you know that?" 

"And you're a kinkshamer, but we all have our faults."

Max huffed, but didn't bother arguing. She rubbed the back of her sore skull, wincing at the sharp pain it produced when she moved over a particularly sensitive spot. All this pain, and for what? Well, she did get to technically grope Victoria, but...still! She wasn't some teenage boy, willing to cause her body harm just so she could cop a quick feel.

"Well, now that I've thoroughly embarrassed myself already," Max starts, walking over to the bed to sit down, pulling her shorts down when they rode up a little too much. They went down to the knee, unlike Victoria's which were more like short shorts, but she wasn't half as confident, so her own shorts riding up to mid-thigh seemed downright scandalous. "How about you get a shirt on and we figure out what we're gonna do for the night."

It wasn't like anyone wanted to see her pasty legs. Max pulled the bottom of her shorts down more. 

"I sleep without a shirt most of the time, but I don't want you having a heart attack in my room, so I guess I'll make an exception."

"Then what do you wear to bed?" Max asked curiously.

"Panties." Victoria replied, casual as ever, and didn't say anything else. Max motioned for her to continue, and got a raised eyebrow.

"....And?"

"And what?"

"Oh my god, that's all you wear?" Max asked, utterly scandalized, when she finally caught on.

"It gets hot." Victoria shrugs. Max eyes go to her chest again, because of course they do, and she looks quickly away.

Victoria walks over to her closet, her back to Max, and pulls out the first thing she sees. It's...not too bad. Just a thin tank top, in a surprisingly cheery blue color. Paired with the off-color purple shorts, this was definitely the most unfashionable Max had seen her. Not that Max was the expert here, because boy howdy was she not, but it was honestly a refreshing change of pace to see Victoria look so casual.

"Okay, I'm decent, so you can look now, hipster." 

Max refrained from saying just how _much_ she was just looking, and responds in a dry tone, "Thanks for wearing clothing, Tori. I know it's gotta be hard."

"I think that's the first time any of my dates," She did air-quotes on the word 'dates'. "Has actually wanted my clothes on."

It was said in a light tone, but there was a slight bitterness to it that made Max's smile drop. 

"Sounds like you've dated some jerks."

"Eh. I was the bad one of most of those." Victoria admitted. "One or two of the popular fuck's dated me at one point."

"Did you do it for popularity?" Max asked and immediately regretted it. Have you ever said something, and meant it in a totally non-offensive way, but it came off sounding awful? Yeah, she just did that a big 'ol helping of that. 

"No, actually. It was back when I first arrived at Blackwell." Victoria replied, surprisingly not offended. She really had tougher skin than Max thought. "But...I was even more of a bitch back then, if you can believe it. So none of those relationships lasted long, and I haven't really been trying for any since then. Mostly just a quick thing here and there."

"How come I never heard about any of it? Before, I mean. I'm friends with most of the popular kids, so..." Here's another one of Max's spews of word vomit. Fantastic.

"They were embarrassed of me." The blunt way it was said, combined with the blank look on Victoria's face, like it wasn't a big deal, made Max instantly feel like the biggest asshole for even asking.

"Wha- I mean, how...?"

"I tried too hard, I guess." Victoria sat down beside her, tone still casual. "You know, to be liked. I think I acted differently then who I actually was, if that makes sense. I can't blame them for not wanting the fact that they dated me to be made public."

"That's still a fucking asshole move!" The fierceness of her tone caught the both of them by surprise. "I mean, I guess it isn't totally their fault, but that's not an excuse. You're not supposed to be embarrassed of your girlfriend. _I'm_ not embarrassed of you." She ignored the part of her brain that reminded her that Victoria had embarrassed her a little bit, in the beginning. Honestly, her brain was an ass. 

"But we're not dating."

"We kind of are." Max responded, biting her lip and trying not to toy with Victoria's comforter nervously. Victoria's expression was stony and unreadable at first, but then morphed into what Max was relieved to call a small smile.

"I guess you're the only exception, Caulfield." She poked Max in the side, a bit too hard but playful nonetheless. 

"Well, ow." Max rubbed her poor rib. "You poke like a body builder, Jesus Christ."

"It was a love tap, calm your shit."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> woah what was that just some...plot?? wow who woulda thought lmao.
> 
> (also thank you sm to all the ppl who rec'd some music!! i really appreciate it and y'all's music taste is 10000/10)


	19. In which I'm too tired to think of a chapter title

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> it's like, 4am and i'm tired and lonely but strangely in a good mood?? idek man writing this made me happy and when i glanced at the kudos count and oh my g od 
> 
> 7 0 0.
> 
> L OR D HELP ME THAT'S A FUCKIGN BIG NUMBER I!!! I PROBABLY HAVENT TALKED TO H A L F THAT MANY PEOPLE IN MY ENTIRE DUMB LIFETIME AND 7 0 0 PEOPLE LEFT KUDOS AND IM GONNA CR Y OH MY GOD I FEEL LIKE I SHOULD...IDEK DO SOMETHING ~SPECIAL~ LIKE SMUT OR SOMETHING BUT IT'S WAY TOO EARLY UNLESS I WROTE SOMETHING 'NONCANON' BUT EHHH. BUT STILL, OH MY GOD.
> 
> 7 0 0 I STILL CANT EVEN W/ THAT NUMBER!!! THANK YALL SO MUCH I S2G I WANNA GO FREAK OUT ABT IT TO EVERYONE I KNOW BUT ITLL SOUND LIKE BRAGGING AND THAT IS N O T WHAT IM TRYING TO DO IM JUST SO THANKFUL!! my writing is so honestly not up to par with the rest of these awesome writers but ppl like my fic anyway and aaaa
> 
> and also- 340 comments?? ok i know that at least half of em are me replying but!! it seriously means so much when people comment and i never wanna say 'pls leave a comment' because i dont wanna feel like i'm begging lmao but its seriously so so nice when people take time out of their day to comment on my dumb story and just fjelkjfkjk
> 
> ok enough of my rambling lets gET TO THE GAYS
> 
> (actually one more thing- i normally don't do this but i love this song sm and feel like it kinda fits victoria sooo. i listened to this: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VC9b2E-imzw while writing the entire chap, and it's a great song so if you wanna, def give it a listen and tell me what you think!!)

Max glanced around awkwardly. Victoria picked at her fingernails, boredom evident on her face.

After the rather perverted madness that'd gone down before and Victoria got some damn clothes on, the both of them kind of just...sat on the bed, not having a clue what to do now. Max hadn't thought this whole sleepover thing through, huh. Hm...

"Wanna play a game?" Max asked, hands fidgeting in her lap. 

"It's night time, Caulfield." Victoria sighed like she was an old woman with back problems and Max was the annoying child that wouldn't leave her alone. 

"Dude, it's like," Max dug her phone from her pocket and glanced at the time. "7. Who goes to sleep at _seven_?"

"No one. But still, we can't exactly play any exciting games."

"Just because we can't play laser tag or some other heart-racing game doesn't mean we can't have fun." Max sniffed. "What about truth or dare? Twenty questions? Never have I ever?"

"Okay, while they all sound stupid, how do you even play the last one?"

"Never have I ever?" Max repeated, eyebrows raised. "You've never played?"

"Yes, I've played countless times, and that's why I just asked you how to play it."

"Hey! Sarcasm is _my_ thing, Chase." 

"Sharing is caring, Caulfield." Victoria snarked, but a playful smile lit up her features and any irritation Max might've felt at the jab went right out the window.

"Of course. Forgive me for my stupidity." Max replied solemnly. "Well, never have I ever is basically...like, you hold up five fingers, right? One person says something that they've never done, and if any member of the group has done that thing, then they put one finger down. The first person to have no fingers up loses. Simple, huh?"

"It sounds alright, I guess, but we're not exactly a group of people." Victoria frowned, putting a hand up to brush a stray strand of hair from her face. Max almost mirrored the action before she realized what she was doing and awkwardly jerked her hand back down, to which Victoria raised an eyebrow. Not one of her finest moments.

"So? It'll still be fun with just you and me. You'll love it, I promise." 

"I don't know..."

"If you don't like it, we can play one round and then move on to something else." Max added.

"Ugh, _fine_." The blonde groaned, but it was clear she wasn't that opposed to it. "I'll play the dumb game."

Max cheered and scooted closer to Victoria on the bed, for no reason in particular, besides that she honestly wanted to. She could admit things now and not feel like a money-hungry, shell of a person. Fuck yeah. "You rule, Vic! Okay, okay, let's get to it." She was way too pumped, but honestly, a good mood like this didn't come often and certainly wasn't unwelcome. 

Victoria bit down on the grin tugging at her lips and held up five fingers like the game apparently required. Damn Max and her ability to be adorable as hell when she's excited. Her small smile shifted to a frown when Max looked confused and....waved at her?

"What're you doing?"

"You did it first, so I assumed I was supposed to wave back...?" Max replied.

"Max."

"What?"

"We're playing never have I ever."

"Yes?"

My god.

"You're supposed to hold up five fingers for the game, dumbass!" 

"Wha- oh." Realization dawning on her face, Max flushed in embarrassment. "I'm so stupid, oh my god."

"Who's the one who's never played this again?" Victoria teased instead of insulting her more, which she could've easily done, but seeing Max so put out strangely made her want to try and make her feel better. Caring about other people wasn't something she did often, but then again, falling in love with dumb, adorable hipsters wasn't something she did often either. "I'll let this go, this one time. Let's just get to the game."

"Yeah." Max said, relieved, and held up five fingers this time instead of being an idiot in every sense of the word. "Okay, I'll start."

Victoria agreed with a nod, subtly leaning in. With the way they were sitting across from each other, if Max asked, she could just lie about her reasoning and say she's just really into this _absolutely riveting_ game, so she milked the closeness for all it was worth.

"Never have I ever..." Max hummed. "Done drugs." 

Victoria reluctantly put her index finger down, and indignantly said, "How're you that popular, and never done any drugs? I call bullshit."

"I haven't! Never seen the point, I guess." Max said, and then realized something. "Wait, you _have_?! Dude!"

"What?" Victoria fidgeted slightly. 

"Hugs not drugs, remember? What have you done? Oh god, please don't let it be hard drugs." Max said, all in one breath, looking every bit of a concerned mom which was kind of cute but also really weird. Victoria couldn't remember her real mother ever acting this concerned for her.

"Enough of the concern, mom, jesus." Victoria huffed, head tilted downward to hopefully mask her blush. "It was only weed. And it's been about a year and a half, so you don't have to worry about dating a stoner or some shit. I've only done it at parties, and it isn't like I'm invited to a lot of those, so."

"Oh." Max replied, for lack of a better response. "Well, I'm glad. Can't be dating a crack addict, now can I?"

"Your standards are impossible." Victoria said sarcastically. "I suppose it's my turn, right?"

"Mmhm!" Max said, instantly back in good spirits. "C'mon, go for it!"

"Don't rush me, Max." Victoria bit her lip. What was a good one that was sure to be something Max has done. It was clear that she was at a disadvantage in this game, with how much fucked up shit she's done. Maybe not _fucked up_ , per se, but compared to Max's squeaky clean lifestyle, the thing's she's done looked downright scandalous.

It was when Max started chanting, "Go Vic, Go Vic, Go Vic!", that Victoria thought of a perfect one that was as brilliant as it was unfair.

"Never have I ever..." She paused for dramatic effect, and all the cheering died down instantly as Max sat silently, eagerly waiting for her what'd she'd say. "Played never I ever."

Victoria has honestly never seen someone's face drop so quickly. 

"Oh, you suck." Max literally _pouted_ , crossing her arms.

"And you swallow." 

"Only with you, sugar." Max blew her a kiss, and Victoria blanched, caught off guard by her more than slightly fliratious comeback.

"Whatever." Victoria grumbled, face feeling hot for the second time that night. "Just put your finger down, hipster."

"I love a girl who knows what she wants." Max leered.

" _I swear to god, Maxine-_ "

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> honestly ive never played never have i ever but honestly it sounds fun sooo
> 
> i was so torn about whether they should play this or truth or dare but!! i compromised so they can play bOTH. probably. 90% sure theyre gonna play it. its probably gonna be stupid shit like "lmao i dare u to kiss my plant" or something like that and itll be a m a z i n g
> 
> (and also!! omg so my cousin had her baby yesterday and nnghh she lives a state away so i'm going to see the little cutie friday and im sO DAMN EXCITED BABIES ARE GR8)


	20. In which they kiss and it isn't angst fueled. Wow!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *sweats nervously* gee has it rly been 11 days since my last update jfc im so sorry yall.
> 
> i've been freaking out abt so many non-lis things lately (steven universe, gravity falls omfg i just started watching and finished season 1 and i adoreee, and a bunch of anime and fijkeljf3q) also school has been a pain and just so stressful that i didnt even have time for the gays ;u; but nOW I DO!!!!!!!
> 
> (annnd i posted the fucked up thing i mentioned a while ago ;u; its not even lesbians yall im so sorr y i had to get my femdom kink o ut somehow)
> 
> EDIT: jfc i had to delete tthis chap and repost it because it kept mixing words up in all kinds of wonky-ness and fklrkjke sorry

"Hm...alright," Max starts, looking at Victoria with a solemn expression. "Even though you're a cheater-"

"You can't cheat at this kind of game-"

"EVEN THOUGH YOU'RE A CHEATER..." Max calmly repeats herself, only louder to the point of almost shouting. "I'll still be fair on my turn, because I'm cool like that."

"Whatever. Get on with it, I'm not getting any younger here." Victoria muttered, faux-annoyed, and propped her arm up on one leg, letting her chin rest against her upturned palm as she gazed at Max with a put-out expression.

"Oh, believe me, I can tell."

"Fuck all the way off, honeybuns." She huffed through pursed lips that hid a smile.

"Shh, I'm trying to think of a good thing to say for my turn."

Victoria waited, albeit extremely impatiently, until finally Max said, "Ooh, I got a great one! Never have I ever...kissed a boy."

"Fair, my ass!" Victoria griped, putting her middle finger down. "I just _told_ you I dated a few guys when I first joined Blackwell. Did you assume we just played hopscotch and blew bubbles or something?"

"Ooh, darn. Must've slipped my mind, heheh." 

Victoria huffed, but there wasn't any bite in it. Max was somewhat relieved. A second after she'd done that, she realized that it could easily be seen as her not taking Victoria's problems seriously, and lord knows she didn't want the girl giving her the cold shoulder again. 

"Never have I ever...kissed a blonde person."

"You're such a damn cheater." Her second finger went down. "How about we play something else?"

"Whhhaat?" Victoria drawled, scooting up so she was beside Max, and slung an arm around her shoulders. "I thought you wanted to play, remember? You practically begged."

"I did no such thing-" Max subconsciously leaned in closer, and her hands that'd previously been in her lap now spread out in a relaxed manner. Victoria being so close should've had the opposite affect, but eh. Her body has always been weird. "Stop making everything sound so... _kinky_."

"Says the person who said they only swallowed when it came to me." Snorting dismissively, Victoria's hand toyed with strands of Max's hair, seemingly without realizing. Max didn't comment on it. People touching your hair actually felt really nice, okay?

"It was a joke, Tori. I'm not _that_ innocent to where I can't make dirty jokes." Max's eyes drifted shut in relaxation as the other girl's fingers gently combed through her hair.

"Please. You're practically holy in your innocence. I bet that people get holy water from your bath after you finish."

"That doesn't even make sense. And I am not that innocent, you jerk." Max grumbled halfheartedly. "And if I am, does that make you the _sinful_ woman who comes to steal my innocence?"

"Of course, who else would I be?" Victoria chuckled, warm breath tickling Max's ear, and leaned in even closer to whisper, "I'm gonna take your innocence _so_ hard and you're going to love it." Max almost opened her eyes, unsure if she should lean away, but Victoria seemed to be joking with the way she started giggling right in her ear. Max didn't mind. Hearing Victoria Chase giggle was rare as hell, so she might as well enjoy it while it lasts.

"Have fun with that, blondie." Max said. "A kiss is all you might get from my oh-so-virginal self for a while."

"So you're implying that there might be more than kissing in the future?" Victoria asked, rather blunt even for herself. Max opened her eyes to see the other staring straight at her, clearly wanting some kind of response.

"I dunno, I guess." Max replied quietly. She knew she wasn't ready right now, and she didn't know if she would be in the near future. It was stupid, but...she wanted her first to be someone _special_. Victoria was really seeming like that kind of someone, but...her emotional outbursts and extreme behavior still made a small part of Max pull back at times. She didn't like it, didn't want to be distant when Victoria didn't even _do_ anything, but...ugh, why does she have to get all weird and depressing now? She sucked, honestly. "I don't think I'm ready right now. I'm sorry."

She expected Victoria to snap at her about being a dumb virgin, but all she got was a pat on the head, followed by a reply of, "Don't apologize, stupid. You don't feel bad for something like this, alright? You'll be ready someday, or maybe you won't. Who knows, and who cares? I'll always be around to annoy you, virgin or not."

Max hurredly wiped at her eyes when she felt the tell-tale feeling of tears incoming. Gee, was it that time of the month or did Victoria just almost make her cry happy tears?

"Look at you, being nice and junk." Max sniffled, elbowing Victoria in the side to hopefully distract her from Max's not-crying. "I'm blushing."

"Ow! Watch it, hippie! I be nice and this is what I get, Jesus Christ..." Victoria muttered, removing her arm from around Max's shoulders. Max was gonna apologize, when a certain... _idea_ came to her. 

Before Victoria could completely move away, Max wrapped _her_ arm around her shoulders and planted a straight-up _smooch_ on Victoria's lips.

It was a peck, really. It lasted about a second and a half, and Max was grinning when she pulled back. Victoria's mouth was parted, eyes wide, and that only made her smile widen.

"Now _that_ was a kiss. Who's the innocent one now, Princess?" She teased. "Your face looks like it's about to catch on fire."

" _S-Shut up-_ "

"Shhh, I can't hear you over the sound of your blush." Max laughed, placing a kiss on Victoria again, on her cheek this time, just because she could. Victoria _squeaked_ , and that only encouraged Max even more. "I wonder how many times I can kiss you before you crack."

"I will kill you, I swear on everything-"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> lowkey wondering if i rly should make this smutty?? like...i feel like i could do the smut alright, i'm nor worried abt that but i dunno if i should make this story smutty at all? idk tell me what you think!! i might lmao it depends on what ppl think about it so tell me your opinion on me possibly adding smut or not
> 
> (also!! a weird request buttt...
> 
> if anyone has any anime they could recommend, i'd be really happy!! hella hella into yuri/yaoi or even just some hints at it :D hetero stuff usually ain't my thing, but if it has some kind of twist (guy is feminine, reversed roles, girl is more dominant) then feel free to rec it!! also horror bc horror rules yyiiis. any is fine tho, so if u have any u can think of, pls tell me ;o;and if ive already seen the one u recommend then we can become buddies and freak out about said anime)  
> Notes:


	21. In Which the word 'pun' is said way too many times

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i feel like these chaps are taking too long ;u;
> 
> sorry abt that! my sisters just got out for summer and our pool got put up a few days ago and we've basically been living in it since because pools are awesome man.
> 
> and i've been into different things besides life is strange (bLASPHEMY I KNOW) like gravity falls and a fuckton of anime along with steven universe season three so i havent rly been into writing lately ;u; 
> 
> (but also!! my bro vixie recently started writing a fic that i def def defff recommend! i got her into shipping the trash ship known as chasefield, but she's still a pricefield shipper at heart, sooo she wrote a poly fic!! the pairing is victoria/max/chloe and it's so so good and in-character and if poly fics are your shiz or you just really like good writing and gayness abound, then go give it a read and tell her i sent ya ;) here's the link:
> 
> http://archiveofourown.org/works/6882589 )

After about twenty more minutes of general fucking around, Victoria checked her phone for the time. 

10:02. Not late by any means. She can't decide if time is passing too slowly or quickly for her taste. Max is currently texting someone on her phone. Probably that girl with the massive boner for Jesus or that one thirsty dude who follows her around everywhere. They seem to be her closest friends.

Who is she to Max, Victoria wonders silently. A girlfriend? A friend? A close friend? Max had been infuriatingly vague on how she really felt about Victoria earlier, and she didn't want to spoil the positive mood with her stupid depressive episodes. Victoria's been in relationships that were built on toxic behavior and passive-aggressive fights, thoughts of being unworthy, that ache you felt at the bottom of your stomach when you realize it's just not going to work out.

When she was with Max, it...wasn't like that. Not at all.

When Victoria thought of Max, she felt a fondness that had an edge of exasperation that wasn't at all malicious. Max reminded her of a baby deer, stumbling around and trying to find it's way and seeming graceful and ridiculous and adorable all at once. Not that long ago, Victoria had questioned how someone like her had gotten so popular. She was awkward and had the fashion of a rock, after all. But after getting this close to the girl, Victoria understood. 

Max had a way of making you feel special and included. Things about her that used to annoy Victoria now seemed endearing. 

She was whipped. No doubt about that. 

Maybe Max was too. Considering how virginal the dork was, she probably wouldn't kiss Victoria like that if she wasn't serious about this.

...Right?

Ugh, Victoria hated her emotions sometimes. 

"-ctoria? Victoria? Vic!"

"Huh?" Victoria was shaken out of her thoughts by Max calling her name, nudging her shoulder when she still didn't respond. She looked up to see Max gazing at her with an expression that was concerned, and even a bit worried.

"You were spaced out for a while, dude. You alright?" Max asked. Victoria blushed, reluctantly flattered at the concern.

"So I guess you could say I..." Victoria paused for dramatic affect, just like Max liked to do every time she was about to say something idiotic. "Looked a million miles away?"

Max stared at her, a strange half-smile that held stiffly on her face. It took Victoria a moment to realize what that expression meant. She didn't get the pun. _Goddamnit, the one time she actually tries to be funny-_

"Spaced out, right? Get it?" Victoria grimaces as she attempts to explain her badly timed and poor excuse for a joke. "Space is a million miles away-"

"Well, to be perfectly honest," Max interrupted her suddenly. "I would actually say that you looked _out of this world_."

Victoria stared at everything but Max, not wanting to see the smug and/or suggestive look on the little brat's face as she out-punned Victoria on a critical level and also managed to compliment her too. 

"Oh, shut up." Victoria grumbled, even as her lips twitched from holding in a smile. It certainly wasn't because of the pun, god, no, she still hated puns with a passion, no matter how objectively clever they could be. It was Max that was making her smile. But then again, when _wasn't_ Max making her want to smile? 

"Come on, that was a good one!" Max leaned against her, laughing. "Yours wasn't bad, but if you hadn't said it to a pun _expert_ like myself, no one would've gotten the joke."

"Not like I'd ever try to tell a pun to anyone else." Victoria grumbled.

"Huh? Why not? Puns are god's gift to man, Tori."

"Not to me. When it comes to jokes, puns are the bottom of the barrel. They're not even _funny_."

"First of all, don't ever speak of such blasphemy ever again." Max said, and Victoria's body twitched embarassingly when the other's hand sought her own, although she didn't pull away. Hand-holding was cheesy, but Max herself was cheesy. Victoria had grown to like it at this point. "Second of all, didn't you just attempt to tell me a pun no less than forty-five seconds ago? And I think I remember you making that lame apple joke at lunch too!"

"Well, yes," Victoria admitted. "but that doesn't change my opinion on them."

"Then why did you try to tell me a pun in the first place?"

"Uh...you know." Victoria's eyes darted around the room awkwardly.

"I don't, actually? Please elaborate." Max squeezed her hand in a gesture of comfort.

"Because you...like them. You're always firing off terrible jokes, and they're mostly puns. I figured you'd laugh if I tried to, y'know," Victoria went silent. She sounded so _stupid_ and desperate, Jesus Christ. How did Max think so highly of her? 

... _Did Max think highly of her_?

Her rapidly depressing thoughts were interrupted as she felt two arms wrap around her in a crushing hug. 

"Oh my _goddddd_ ," Max practically screamed into her shoulder. "You told a pun, just for me. I'm gonna cry. Your pun was great, but you're amazing, Vic. I need to write this down for memories, holy fuck, where's my journal-"

Victoria considered pulling away and pretending that she wasn't literally on the edge of happy tears herself, but she dismissed the idea as soon as it came and returned the hug instead, listening silently to Max's excited rambling with a small smile.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i felt like this chap wasnt that good but ;u; i tried!
> 
> and i've gotten a few comments (not like...hate comments or anything like that they were actually rly sweet omg) saying that vic is ooc and t r u s t me that is on purpose
> 
> if i wrote vic as canon as possible then max wouldve probably called off the deal at like. chapter 4. 
> 
> i went back and visited one of the first lis fic i wrote (hatefuck) and i wrote victoria as in-character as possible and after rereading it i'm like "wOW WHAT A BITCH" like damn....and it's kinda sad in a way (as in SPOILER ALERT vic kinda just wants max for her looks and thinks her personality/fashion/interests are absolutely terrible) and i dunno how i wrote it but. it's like my second popular fic so ppl liked it for some reason!! i need to write the last chap of that actually...hm. 
> 
> (also!! jfc i rly request too much of y'all but i'm in a weird mood and idk if im sad or just tired but itd help a lot if anybody could tell me some personal chasefield headcanons of theirs!! cute ones or angsty ones or nsfw ones, they're all great so pls tell me if anybody has any!! a warning tho! if i like em a lot then i might steal the idea and write something of it because i'm evil >:D
> 
> jk jk i'll give credit buT STILL)


	22. In Which i'm so sORRY FOR TAKING SO LONG TO UPDATE FORGIVE ME

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> me: oh i think its probs time to start writing for rentagirlfriend again its only been a few days right
> 
> me: *checks date*
> 
> me: fKCU
> 
> FNREJLJ IM SO SORRY FOR TAKING SO LONG!!! I HAD TO START DOING SCHOOLING SHIT AGAIN AND AAAAA
> 
>  
> 
> a lot of things have happened and i kinda lost motivation for this for a lil while ;u; my kitty got his poor little leg crushed in an accident a week or so ago and had to get it amputated (he's chill now tho dw!) and some family issues and i kinda got burnt out on lis for a little while and y eah. but im back!!
> 
> i feel so bad omg i havent left this long since like...the third chapter. but i rly dont plan on taking this long again (famous last words) and i think i figured out how i'm gonna end it!!
> 
> this WILL end at chap 25 ;u; i'll be including smut in the epilogue so ppl don't have to read it if its not their thing! i swearrrr im gonna finish this dw yall i still love life is strange i think ive just been...writing too much of it for a while and got burnt out of it a bit :')
> 
> (ALSO THESE NOTES ARE GETTING LONGER THAN MY ENTIRE LIFESPAN RN BUT...THANK YALL SO MUCH FOR 8 0 0 FAVORITES THATS FUCKING INSANE HOW DID THIS SHITFEST GET THAT MUCH I JUST!! AAAA!!! 
> 
> SRSLY THIS IS THE FIC THAT MADE ME FEEL BETTER ABT MY WRITING AND EVERYONES SO NICE WITH THEIR COMMENTS AND JUS!T!! THANK YALL I CANT EVEN TYPE IM SO HYPED)

"What time is it again?" Max mumbled, eyes lidded as she leaned against Victoria to peer at her phone. "1? 2?"

"11:30." Victoria snickered, willfully ignoring the week-old texts from her parents. She'll reply soon enough. She's got better things to worry about. Like Max. "Why, you getting sleepy, Caulfield? What happened to wanting to stay up all night and play truth or dare like big kids?"

"I am the biggest, most adult kid you'll ever meet, Chase." 

"Sure. Are you actually tired though?"

"A little." Max admitted, tucking a stray strand of hair behind her ear. "Having so much fun tired me out, I guess." She nudged Victoria's shoulder, winking playfully.

"Now you're just buttering me up." Victoria snarked, even as the way she looked at Max was almost _shy_. 

"Nah, I'm just honest." She said truthfully, and Victoria huffed and looked in the other direction, face red.

Truthfully, it was a little late. Students couldn't leave the dorms after nine, and most of the chatter stopped around 10, so it was pretty quiet. Neither of them noticed the silence all that much, because of their 'witty' back and forth banter, but Max did notice it now. She yawned, not bothering to cover her mouth. Manners are for the weak.

"Do you seriously want to sleep?"

"Kind of." Max replied honestly.

"Hmph. Guess you just weren't brave enough for truth or dare." Victoria said, casual as can be, but the edge of a challenge in her tone was clear. 

"Uh, excuse you." Max sat up, rubbing her eyes so she could glare effectively at Victoria. "I am totally brave enough for a kiddie game."

"It's only a kiddie game if children are playing it..." Victoria said suggestively. "And we are most certainly not kids. Have you ever played this with other teenagers?"

"No." Max admitted, rolling her eyes at Victoria's attempts to be smooth and get a rise out of her. "What, do people dare other people to go to third base in front of the group of players or something?" She'd meant it as a joke. People didn't actually do that, did they?

"Oh, more than that. There's usually drugs involved, and not just weed. The dares are almost always sexual. And on the rare occasion that they're not, then the dares are completely disgusting and weird."

"Shut _up_! You're totally pulling my leg!"

"Not really. Okay, I kind of am. Truth or dare does get pretty crazy, but it's usually because the players are drunk as fuck and at some party. If we _did_ play, I'd go easy on you. And I can already see how easy your dares would be."

"As easy as you are in bed." Max grumbled. 

"Only with you, _Maxi Pad_."

Did she _really_ just-

"Alright." Max said loudly. "That's it. I'll play the stupid game, and you are going _down_."

"Now that's the spirit." Victoria grinned, pretty excited despite Max's irritability. There were so many dare options...Some silly, some gross, some easy, because she'd been serious about being gentle with the first few. 

She decided not to go for any sexual, even vaguely so, dares. Or truths, for that matter. Victoria, unpopularity be damned, happened to be very attractive. She'd had already had her fair share of sexual encounters in life, and was by no means a virgin. She was also a fairly sexual person.

But it made Max uncomfortable, and that was the last thing she wanted to do. 

Max was giving her a real chance here, and doing her a huge favor for absolutely no gain. The least Victoria could do was be a good friend, _girlfriend_ , and respect her boundaries.

The two of them sat across from each other. Max was cross-legged, staring at Victoria with an expression that was almost sly, like she was planning something. Pft, she was probably gonna dare Victoria to lick her own foot or something. That seemed like Max's version of hardcore.

"I'll go first." Victoria broke the silence, eyes glittering from excitement. What can she say, she always loved these games, childish or not. "Truth or dare, Maxine?"

"Hmm...truth, I guess." Max said, leaning forward a bit as she waited for Victoria to reply. 

"Alright..." She thought for a moment, idly tapping her chin with a manicured finger. Nothing overtly sexual, keep it in your pants, Chase."Is it true that you...like me?"

She'd meant it as a joke, but it sounded rather pathetic. Whoops.

"Oh, gee, how will I ever answer this one." Max muttered, rolling her eyes. "Yes, I like you, Vic. You're the light of my life and all that jazz. Give me something hard next time!"

"I did say I'd go easy at first." Victoria reminded her. "Your turn."

"Ooh, okay." Max perked up, the sly look coming back. "Truth or dare, Vic?"

"Dare." She said immediately. What did she have to lose? Max's dare was almost certainly gonna be something so bland, so utterly easy-

"I dare you to kiss me."

"...Come again?" Her voice cracked embarrassingly. 

"What, is that too much to ask?" Max mocked, crossing her arms with a victorious grin. "I think...I hear something. Oh, right, it's the sound of you being a _chicken_."

"I am no such thing!" Victoria replied, offended. 

"Well, what are you waiting for then? My mouth is ready for some lovin', so pucker up." Max closed her eyes expectantly. "I'm waiting."

Victoria was going to ask her to please never say anything like that again, and probably argue some more, before she realized, _why the fuck was she protesting this_? Wasn't she just thirsty as all hell? Max was outright asking, no, daring, her to kiss her. She really would be a dumbass if she tried backing out.

She leaned closer, cupping Max's cheek with a gentle hand. Max twitched, lips parting just a bit. 

Unable to even try and hold off any more, Victoria kissed her. 

It was gentle. Certainly not a peck, but nothing in the _I'm trying to eat your entire face_ variety either. There was really no tongue at all. Victoria knew she didn't exactly have to keep it chaste, but she wanted to. If Max wanted to go further, then holy fuck, Victoria was _more_ than ready. But this was alright too.

Max sighed happily into the kiss, wrapping an arm loosely around Victoria's shoulders, hand toying softly with her hair.

No, this was more than alright. This was fantastic.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this prolly wasnt the greatest since im tryna get into the swing of things bUT HOOOOOHOOOO KISSES KISSES KISSES 
> 
> also!!!!!!! holy shit during my '''hiatus''' ive watched so many series hnngg (totally feel free to not read this i just like rambling in these authors notes ok) 
> 
> i finished gravity falls!!!! ho ho holy fuck man that was a masterpiece i adored every second of it (ofc i ship all the problematic shit ;u; except pinecest because..no) and i think stan is my fav character!! also watched over the garden wall for the hell of it and wooo that was gr8 too!! ALSO I JUST STARTED USING NETFLIX AND IM IN LOVE I DONT HAVE TO GO TO MY COUSINS TO WATCH ORANGE IS THE NEW BLACK ANYMORE YAY 
> 
> (if u wanna give me suggestions on what to watch i am sO GAME)


	23. In which Victoria is awkward and Max is a nerd and everything is gay

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> my updating schedule is so out of wack man idek :')
> 
> but yall can thank my bro CalmSurrender for telling me to hurry tf up and update this gayness (i mentioned u aNYWAY GET REKT) because without her id probably be back here in a month saying "OMGIMSORRYPLSFORGIVEMEFJRKJW" again :'''D
> 
> the end of this fic is very near! technically chap 24 will be the end, but then chap 25 will have the smut hehehe ;) the smut is ofc gonna be something extra and not relevant to the story, so if smut isnt ur thing, feel free to not read that!! (also pls dont be disappointed by the ending omg im a new writer cut me some slack aaaaa- NO ONE DIES OR ANYTHING CRAZY LIKE THAT IM JUST TERRIFIED PPL WONT LIKE THE WAY IT ENDS SJKLJRKL)

It was when Victoria licked tenderly at her bottom lip that Max decided to pull away. Victoria was fuming at her own actions and Max looked guilty. 

"Sorry-" Victoria tried to apologize immediately

"Sorry!" Max said at the same time she did, guilty expression deepening. Eyes widening, they looked awkwardly away from each other.

"Wait, why're you sorry?" Victoria asked, confused.

"A lot of reasons." Max mumbled, crossing her arms. "I dunno. I feel bad that I won't do more than...kissing, I guess. I don't know. I'm sorry." 

She expected Victoria to graciously accept her apology and maybe continue kissing her. She didn't expect a rough jab in the arm.

"Ow! The heck was that for?!"

"You're an idiot." Victoria deadpanned, looking part exasperated and part regretful. "Maxine, honestly, if...say, Kate, came to you and and said that she felt bad because some fuckboy she was dating was trying to take things further, and she didn't, what would you say?"

"I would be confused, because Kate is asexual and not interested in guys?"

"For the love of-" Victoria ran a hand down her tired, tired face. "I was just using her as an example, you potato."

"An example for what?"

"For you, Caulfield, holy shit, do I have to spell it out? Y-O-U have your own boundaries. It's your choice to have someone cross them. If I," Victoria pointedly gestured to Max, then at herself. "Do something that you aren't sure you want, please tell me. Punch the hell out of me too, if I'm being particularly idiotic. No one should ever feel bad for not wanting to do something sexually, under no circumstances. I was a dumbass. I should have let you take the lead, but instead I went too far."

"But-"

"But nothing. I'm sorry, okay? _I'm_ the only one who should be sorry."

"No!" Max persisted.

"And why not?"

"Because-" Max fumbled for words. "You're...you're so pretty and talented and...I don't know what the people at school see in me. You're sweeter than people peg you for, and you're beautiful, and I'm just, just _not_. I know appearances are a stupid thing to care about, but mine is so plain and yours is the complete opposite. Hell, even my photography skills are mediocre compared to yours."

Silence. Victoria was partly stunned, staring at Max wordlessly. 

She'd always had an inkling that the other girl's self esteem could be better, but she had no idea that she felt so poorly about herself. How could she hold someone like _Victoria_ in such high regard, and treat herself this way? It made no sense.

"Max, why would you even...you're amazing." She said truthfully, absolutely none of the snark or sarcasm she usually had was present. "I have no idea what you could dislike about yourself. You're caring, sweet, selfless, and you've basically changed my opinion on the popularity ranking in Blackwell. Everyone loves you, reasonably so!"

"But-" Max tried to interrupt, but Victoria continued. 

"And about your appearance?" Victoria made a 'ppft!' sound to hopefully show how all of what Max just said was a load of bull. "Pardon my french, but you're hot. _As fuck_. We may be complete opposites, appearance-wise, but that doesn't mean at all that you aren't gorgeous. Your hair? Hot damn. Your eyes? Someone call the sky and tell it that it's fired because your eyes are even more blue. Your everything? I'm drooling, practically."

"Max, I obsess over my appearance and use a fuckton of ridiculously overpriced beauty products because of how insecure I am. I'm no goddess, even after all that. You," She smiled softly, brushing a strand of hair away that hung in Max's face. "Are gorgeous without trying. "

Now it was Max's turn to stare at Victoria in awe. 

Normally, Victoria was sparse with her genuine compliments, due to her cynical and sarcastic nature she proudly sported. But she'd practically wrote a novel on how beautiful and amazing she thought Max was, without a single trace of dishonesty.

In the next instant, Max's arms were wrapped around her waist in a crushing hug, loud _thank yous_ practically screamed in her ear. Victoria endured it for Max, and she had to admit, it did feel nice to be hugged by the person you were kind of in love with. Even if Maxine did hug way too hard.

No less than fifteen more minutes of neverending gratitude from Max, Victoria asked her to check the time.

"Almost 1am. Why, you getting tired?"

"Actually, yeah." Victoria replied, scooting away slightly just so she could lay down. "So much for our scandalous game of truth or dare, huh?"

Max laughed, moving to lay down alongside her. "Maybe we can continue after school tomorrow?"

"It's a date." Victoria grinned, eyes closing. "We're sleeping on the same bed, I assume?"

"Mmm." Max hummed.

"That's so gay."

"I know. I love it."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i realize a lot of this was about boundaries and consent an all that, wow
> 
> ok while i may write some hecka sinful stuff, this fic is pretty pure ok and i love the idea that vic is so careful and understanding about max's boundaries and that consent is everything to her and i just think its rly nice!! idk man i love me some experienced but sweet vic, ya know? 
> 
> and i also touched on max not being that self-confident because aaah i headcanon her as being more appearance-conscious, while vic is more conscious of how other people see her and feel about her. and i love the idea of vic just...loving tf out of every part of max and tbh the smut is probs gonna have some praise kink and body worship because dang is that cute!!
> 
> (and if u plan on reading the chap where they do the dirty, its gonna be all kinds of cute and awkward because max is cute and awkward and while i usually write my smut as unrealistically perfect, i just caaanntt with this fic so its gonna be cute and unexperienced and yayyayay)


	24. In Which It's fINISHED. Sorta.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i cant believe its mid july and im just now updating i am so so so so so so sorry!! i got into this huge writing slump :')
> 
> i'd like to dedicate this once again to my broski, calmsurrender, for gently pushing me to update and encouraging me!!!
> 
>  
> 
> IT'S FINALLY FINISHED!!!! well kinda. i still have the smut, but if u dont plan on reading it then ye this is done. my god that's crazy!! this is my first actually finished multi-chaptered fic and iiiimm so emotional rn ahh. i hope you guys enjoy the last chapter! its not this epic ending haha, but i tried.
> 
> (also this fic hit..9 0 0 kudos. lord fucking help me thats way more than this dumb story ever deserved i just. thank yOU ALL SO SO MUCH FOR THE SUPPORT YOURE ALL TOO NICE TO ME IM FRKJFKE ILY <333)

Max woke up in a place that wasn't her room, with something warm clinging to her arm. Her phone's alarm was ringing shrilly, like it did every morning to wake her up for school. Eyes still closed, she huffed and fumbled for the phone, managing to turn off her alarm with her eyes closed. True skills, if she does say so herself.

After a good five seconds of confusion, she remembered where she was. Victoria's room. Meaning that the thing clinging to her arm was...

Max opened her eyes slowly, and yep, it was Victoria. The girl had practically latched herself to Max, hugging her arm and leg slung over Max's thighs. Her face was pressed against Max's shoulder, and Max was only a bit digusted when she felt drool leaking into her shirt. Considering that Victoria's tongue has been in Max's mouth before, it'd be a little stupid to throw a fit about her drooling.

The blonde's face was scrunched up, and she somehow looked even saltier in slumber. It was really cute, oh, god, Max really needed to stop finding everything she did so endearing.

As cute as it was though, they both needed to get up. School was a must. This was also their first day as a couple.

A real couple, at least. Jesus. Why did she feel even more nervous than she did before?

"Vic, wake up." She sat up, patting Victoria's shoulder. 

No response. 

"Victoria Chaaaaase." She sang loudly. Victoria grumbled. Patience waning just a smidge, Max flicked her forehead. 

"Ow." Victoria mumbled, eyes blearily opening. 

"Rise and shine, sleeping beauty." Max gave a shit-eating grin down at her. "Time for school."

"Ugh, let me wallow in my sins in peace." Victoria mumbled, throwing an arm over her face.

"You can do that in class." Max got up, raising her arms above her head in a languid stretch, back cracking satisfyingly. "Seriously, we gotta be in class in about fifteen minutes. Don't wanna be late as an official couple, now do we?"

While Max couldn't see most of her face, she could see how red her ears got right after she spoke. "Ugh, fine. I guess that's a good enough reason to get up."

"Good." 

Max was about to make her way to the showers, before she remembered that they really didn't have time for it. Guess lathering on way too much deoderant would have to do. She looked over at Victoria to make sure she was still awake, and thankfully, the blonde was already looking through her closet for an outfit.

"Caulfield..." Victoria trailed off, fingers toying with the edge of an expensive looking skirt. 

"Yeah?" 

"I have a suggestion."

"Oh?" She said, for lack of better words. 

"Yes. How...would you feel about wearing an outfit of mine?"

"...Huh?" She asked, confused. "What for?"

"It's not just because your fashion sense is...rather lacking." Victoria smirked. 

"Gee, thanks. I'll make sure to buy a whole 'nother wardrobe with my millions of dollars I clearly I have." Max rolled her eyes. "Wouldn't people think that we, uh, did things...if I was wearing your clothes?"

"Exactly!" Victoria said. "Wouldn't it be fun? Having everyone thinking that the lovable nerd Maxine Caulfield is actually a _sex machine_ who wears her girlfriend's clothes after the dirty deed."

Max stared at her blankly for a full three seconds. Then, unable to help it, she snorts loudly, laughing so hard she actually had to hold her stomach. "Oh my god, why do you sound like one of those cheap romance novels that have more heterosexual sex than actual plot. Sex machine, really?"

"I do not." Victoria looks so offended and it only made the situation funnier. "So you're saying you don't want to wear my clothes?"

"I mean, I'm not opposed to it." She shrugs, when an idea comes to her. An amazing idea. "I'll do it...if _you_ wear one of my outfits."

Victoria has an expression like Max had just asked her to chew glass. She looks back at her closet, then back at Max, like she's wondering if seeing Max in an outfit worth more than Max herself was worth something so terrible. "I...I guess. But _I_ pick out the outfit you wear."

"If you let me pick out yours, then sure." Max laughed inwardly at Victoria's pained expression. 

"Fine. I guess. Please...pick out something nice. No obscure band shirts, no jeans with holes, absolutely _no_ plaid." 

"That's already 90% of my wardrobe, but alright." Max opens the door to Vic's room, going to her own room to pick out the outfit for Victoria. Victoria was already pulling things out of her closet, like she'd had Max's outfit picked out from the beginning. It wouldn't surprise her. 

She looked into her closet with a critical stare. A lot of plaid, shit, Victoria really knew her. 

She found some converse that looked kind of new, so that was good for the shoes. Probably. She decided on some holeless skinny jeans that were a faded blue. Good thing her and Vic were the same size, huh. She almost, _almost_ , picked out an old-ass shirt that she'd bought ironically, that said 'SENPAI' in big, bold lettering, but she'd probably never hear the end of it if she did.

The shirt was the hardest part, so in the end, she decided she wouldn't pick out one. Instead, she found an old hoodie that didn't seem too hipster. It was white, and had a doe printed on the front in this cool, filter-y rainbow color. Damn, she should wear this more often.

It would look awesome on Tori too. Hopefully she wouldn't throw a fit about wearing it. 

On the way out, she snagged herself a bra and panties. Wearing the same pair for more than two days was just kinda gross. 

"Honey, I'm home." She announced, shutting Victoria's door behind her. "And I brought clothes."

"Good ones, I hope." Victoria said, but Max could tell she was joking by the way she smiled over at her. "I found some fantastic ones for you, by the way."

"Really now." Max asked, grinning. "Am I going to look, uh, smoking hot?"

"Of course. You're going to burn down the entire _school_ with your hotness." Victoria said with a straight face, setting out all of what she'd picked out on the bed.

"Violent, holy crap." She laughed. "Well, we should probably hurry. We seriously have about five minutes."

"Great. Guess I'll have to skip most of my cosmetic routine." Victoria sighed woefully, gesturing to the clothing on the bed. "Get dressed, then. Hand over the clothes you picked, too. If I see one shade of plaid, I will scream."

"No plaid in sight, relax." She said, unusually cheerful, and handed over her clothes. 

She turned around to let Victoria have her privacy once she's picked up her own outfit for the day. Max took a minute to figure out what Victoria had picked. It...wasn't as elaborate or out of bounds for Max, actually. But, as fashionable as Victoria was, she'd probably picked out what she knew wouldn't be too out of Max's comfort zone. 

Some jean shorts with a white pattern, a little too short maybe, but really nice. A black button-up shirt with golden buttons, and a really pretty golden collar. Victoria really loved button-ups, didn't she? To top it off, she'd added some shoes that were a cool silver color.

All in all, Max was pretty happy. She would probably already wear stuff like this, if it wasn't so damn expensive. Except maybe the shorts, but that was just because they barely came to mid-thigh, and Max was stupidly self-conscious. She changed into the clothes quickly, honestly feeling a little rad. Like she was a new person, sort of. Except that she was still lame ol' Max, just with cool clothes, but still.

"You done, Vic?" She asked. 

"Yeah, almost." Victoria mumbled. "You can turn around, I'm just putting on the shoes."

"Nice. So, how d'you feel about the-" Max turned around, and stopped mid-sentence. Victoria looked...holy shit. Holy _shit_.

She looked...cool. Badass, even. Her hair didn't have a shred of gel, so it was in curly little waves and hung in her dark eyes. The jeans accentuated her legs (and ass, because let's be honest here, Max was staring at that too) and clashed with the shoes in a way that looked nice. The hoodie really was the icing on the cake. Victoria's default expression always looked faintly mocking, usually a smirk or a glare, and with this outfit, she looked...hot. Not to say she didn't always look hot, but...instead of looking like a hot rich girl, she looked like the type of woman you'd find smoking in an alley, slyly making fun of any poor sap's stuttered attempts to make conversation with her, pushing some girl up against the wall and making out with her on the first date. 

Did any of that make sense? Probably not. The point is, Victoria looked fucking rad. 

"The...shoes. Uh, I mean, outfit. Yeah." Max faintly continued, after she realized Victoria was staring at her too. 

"It'll do, I suppose. But...Caulfield, holy shit." Victoria started. "You look...amazing, and that is an understatement. You look like the type of photographer that needs to be photographed and put in a magazine immediately."

Wow. Well, you might as well call Max a tomato from now on because she sure as hell was blushing the exact color of one. "T-thanks. You look like a regular sex machine yourself, Vic."

Victoria bit her lip to hold back a smile, cheeks coloring just a tad. "Well then, we're a regular power couple, now aren't we?"

"Totally. Who needs Beyonce and Jay-Z when you have Max and Victoria, haha."

"Wow. I mean, I love myself, but I doubt anyone in their right mind would choose us over Beyonce or Jay-Z." Victoria snorted, and Max shoved her shoulder lightly. 

"I guess." She grabbed her phone, looking at the time. "Shit. 2 minutes. We really gotta get going."

"Okay." Victoria said simply, holding out her hand. Max stared at it, confused. "..Aren't we gonna hold hands? Isn't that what couples do?"

"Not really, but I still wanna hold your hand." Max said, smiling softly and taking her girlfriend's hand. "Is it stupid that I'm more nervous for this, than I was when we were fake dating?"

"It is pretty stupid." Victoria says, laughing at the deadpan look Max gives her. "But..we'll be facing it together, so don't be nervous."

"I'll try."

They start to walk out, bags in hand, when Victoria stops them. "Wait. I have one more thing I need to do."

"What?"

"This." Victoria leans over and gives her a chaste peck to the cheek. "I love you, Max."

"I love you too, nerd." Max says, even as her voice cracks embarrassingly. "Now, c'mon. Let's go show everyone how cool my new girlfriend is."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> and that's the end! im very nervous about it aaah. PLS DONT KILL ME THIS IS MY FIRST OFFICIAL ENDING TO A FIC THAT ISNT A ONESHOT BE GENTLE. (also yES I GOT THEM TO WEAR EACH OTHERS CLOTHES AT LEAST I GOT S M T H OFF THAT BUCKET LIST I MADE FOR THIS FIC ACCOMPLISHED. also the outfit that vic picked for max, is actually an outfit from one of tori's early concept outfits in the game!! bOOM THE THIRD ONE IN THE TOP ROW: https://67.media.tumblr.com/c912f98b560546ffa00f7d73c32af050/tumblr_inline_o1oc5m1vbE1sb0ysq_540.jpg )
> 
> but seriously, thank you so much to all the people who've followed this trainwreck from the beginning, and to the ones who're just now reading. your support is 1000% what kept me going and yall are all the best :D!!!
> 
> but...ive been thinking about something. ok, so, while this fic is basically over besides some smut, i could maybe post some oneshots?? like a bunch of oneshots from this au in one big fic but i dont think many people would read it idk. tell me what u think!! and while my love for lis is still strong, it does wane some when i write for it constantly, but i WILL 100% be finishing the 5 or 6 fics i've left hanging. two or three of em are smut fics haha so it shouldnt be too hard. 
> 
> (my current obsessions are steven universe and gravity falls if anyones wondering haha, and im currently writing things for both of those!)

**Author's Note:**

> Don't expect it to get complicated and/or angsty, this is about as simple and feel-good as you can get tbh.


End file.
